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-   -   Misc So I set out for one goal last night... (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=205219)

Mecca 04-07-2009 04:22 PM

All I can think is where you live must be full of strange ass people if this is normal behaviour.

Hootie 04-07-2009 04:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins (Post 5649155)
After running this through the Internet Douchebag Translator it spits out a result:

Hootie drank two bottles of Boone's Farm, puked on a 200 pounder, went home to jerk off, and fell asleep on a pile of Double Cheeseburger wrappers after being unable to finish while using the scrapings of a Jergen's bottle and his own tears as lube.

Dude, are you kidding me right now?

Is this coming from the guy who posted a photoshopped picture of himself with a totally ugly girl next to him?

And another one with a bag of dogshit next to his face?

Or did I read that thread wrong?

There is no doubt that you are a highly intelligent person...but I've read your threads, I know you like to drink (and throw drinks on girls)...don't be jealous that you can't live the party seen like me and my friends...and don't act like you wouldn't want to, you don't throw drinks on girls if you're not looking to go out and have fun...

One time when my two friends and I took a road trip to Kansas (two years ago for the Border Wars football game and the Chiefs/Raiders)...we set a goal for what we wanted to accomplish at Westport (I think that's what the bar scene is called?)...

1. Make out with a girl
2. Get slapped by a girl
3. Get a drink thrown on one of us by a girl
4. Hook up with a girl (being the hardest since we were staying 30 minutes away)

I accomplished 1, 2 and 3.

All with the same girl.

Those are accomplishments I enjoy achieving.

Buehler445 04-07-2009 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5649147)
I think we all know a person like him I do..and 99% of the time he makes me wanna strangle him.

You know, I don't think I do.

I know a few man whores. I know a lot of partiers, but I really don't think I know any Hooties.
Posted via Mobile Device

Hootie 04-07-2009 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins (Post 5649170)
I have endless funny stories of stupid drunk shit with friends. There are numerous great stories, many of which involve bizarre and hilarious hookups.

I do not post those hoping for acceptance. I don't need or crave it. I'm sorry that the fracture of your 360 has caused you to so vociferously seek out some kind of acceptance since you can't currently get it in Team Doubles.

First off, bringing the 360 into it...very low.

Secondly, I don't give a shit about acceptance on ChiefsPlanet.com.

If I did, I'd follow you and OTWP around giving you Rep and agreeing with your draft comments and telling you how awesome you are.

I post these threads because I think they are funny...obviously the majority of you think I am a sociopathic rapist who lives in a trailerpark...so I don't understand how this would be my way of craving acceptance from the ChiefsPlanet popular?

And as for team doubles, yeah, my TastyBiscuitBoy account is not only a 50, but I've played enough games of team doubles to be a general 50, and again, that is something that makes me borderline incredible.

Mecca 04-07-2009 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445 (Post 5649184)
You know, I don't think I do.

I know a few man whores. I know a lot of partiers, but I really don't think I know any Hooties.
Posted via Mobile Device

I know one who's pretty similar other than he's older...and his hair is falling out now and his life is basically a Jerry Springer episode at this point...

Oh and he's been to rehab and it didn't help.

Hootie 04-07-2009 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445 (Post 5649184)
You know, I don't think I do.

I know a few man whores. I know a lot of partiers, but I really don't think I know any Hooties.
Posted via Mobile Device

I'd love to tell the loitering hippie story from last week that resulted in a riot outside of my apartment that ended up in several rocks flying through my window, a few arrests, and an apology from the unibomber himself a few days later, but I wouldn't know where to start.

Mecca 04-07-2009 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hootie (Post 5649196)
I'd love to tell the loitering hippie story from last week that resulted in a riot outside of my apartment that ended up in several rocks flying through my window, a few arrests, and an apology from the unibomber himself a few days later, but I wouldn't know where to start.

That sounds funnier than the one you told here...

Dave Lane 04-07-2009 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katipan (Post 5649053)
.

Here's to honor!
If you can't come in her come on her!

Well at least its a plan...

Remind me if I meet Hootie some time to wear rubber gloves if we shake hands...

'Hamas' Jenkins 04-07-2009 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hootie (Post 5649180)
There is no doubt that you are a highly intelligent person...but I've read your threads, I know you like to drink (and throw drinks on girls)...don't be jealous that you can't live the party seen like me and my friends...and don't act like you wouldn't want to, you don't throw drinks on girls if you're not looking to go out and have fun....

I do go out and have fun.

What I don't do is post about it while cold sober and act like it's an accomplishment.

You could probably add all the hookup stories of the last year on this site that people just came out about without provocation and I bet they would still be less than the number that you've "had" and posted about in the last two weeks.

Why is that?

Don't be angry if you display attention seeking behavior and don't get the kind of attention that you wanted. Most of us aren't alcoholic fratbags.

I'd bet that most of us here under 30 (like me) go out and have a good time on a regular basis. I don't think that we need to make up stories about hooking up with girls that we cannot prove in order to measure our e-cocks.

Hootie 04-07-2009 04:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins (Post 5649204)
I do go out and have fun.

What I don't do is post about it while cold sober and act like it's an accomplishment.

You could probably add all the hookup stories of the last year on this site that people just came out about without provocation and I bet they would still be less than the number that you've "had" and posted about in the last two weeks.

Why is that?

Don't be angry if you display attention seeking behavior and don't get the kind of attention that you wanted. Most of us aren't alcoholic fratbags.

I'd bet that most of us here under 30 (like me) go out and have a good time on a regular basis. I don't think that we need to make up stories about hooking up with girls that we cannot prove in order to measure our e-cocks.

First off, every story I tell is true.

Secondly, I love being the center of attention. This is attention seeking behavior...that is how I am in real life, too.

My friend Steve, the guy that worked with me and the girl this thread is about, is friends with the girl still. They text from time to time, and facebook each other...

As I said earlier, Em-dawg blocked me from facebook because she knows this story would be on her wall the next day if she allowed me...I used to post ridiculous things on her wall when we dated that she would laugh at and delete the next day because they were extremely inappropriate.

Anyways, if this was a made up story, why would I post the following message on Steve's wall because I KNOW she'd see it, and I KNOW she'd find it ridiculous, and I KNOW they'd both laugh (she makes fun of me every time I see her about blocking me on facebook because she knows it bothers me I can't make fun of her pictures anymore...)

"so last night I had one goal...Pub Wednesday...I haven't done something in months and wanted to accomplish it...Andy doubted me but I put myself in the right place and it happened...so after I was booted (you should be putting this together by now)...I went back to Pub and Cody was at the door sitting there...my fingers did not smell pleasant...so as everyone was leaving we played the chocolate and vanilla game and upset a lot of people."

Also, I had to delete several posts on my wall from my friends about fish sticks and hooking up with buttsack because I didn't want other girls, who would be mad, to find out.

Mecca 04-07-2009 04:36 PM

Ok you have to post a picture of this girl now....after this story you have no choice.

'Hamas' Jenkins 04-07-2009 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hootie (Post 5649214)
First off, every story I tell is true.

Secondly, I love being the center of attention. This is attention seeking behavior...that is how I am in real life, too.

My friend Steve, the guy that worked with me and the girl this thread is about, is friends with the girl still. They text from time to time, and facebook each other...

As I said earlier, Em-dawg blocked me from facebook because she knows this story would be on her wall the next day if she allowed me...I used to post ridiculous things on her wall when we dated that she would laugh at and delete the next day because they were extremely inappropriate.

Anyways, if this was a made up story, why would I post the following message on Steve's wall because I KNOW she'd see it, and I KNOW she'd find it ridiculous, and I KNOW they'd both laugh (she makes fun of me every time I see her about blocking me on facebook because she knows it bothers me I can't make fun of her pictures anymore...)

"so last night I had one goal...Pub Wednesday...I haven't done something in months and wanted to accomplish it...Andy doubted me but I put myself in the right place and it happened...so after I was booted (you should be putting this together by now)...I went back to Pub and Cody was at the door sitting there...my fingers did not smell pleasant...so as everyone was leaving we played the chocolate and vanilla game and upset a lot of people."

Also, I had to delete several posts on my wall from my friends about fish sticks and hooking up with buttsack because I didn't want other girls, who would be mad, to find out.

Well that's definitely iron-clad proof worthy of the due diligence given peer-reviewed articles for acceptance into scientific journals.

Mecca 04-07-2009 04:39 PM

He should literally be required to post pictures of every person he talks about so I know if I see them at some point in life to bring up Hootie either that or immediately go the other way.

unothadeal 04-07-2009 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5649217)
Ok you have to post a picture of this girl now....after this story you have no choice.

One of these three.

http://www.facebook.com/friends/?id=...&nk=0&s=0&st=0

Hootie 04-07-2009 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5649217)
Ok you have to post a picture of this girl now....after this story you have no choice.

That's simply not going to happen.


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