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Worst scouting report ever. |
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180 lbs of Ryan Sims...
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(as far as the night job, that is.) |
Hamas Jenkins, WR:
Has suitable height to play WR at the next level (6'1") but his fluctuating weight may be a concern (is rumored near the 200 lb. mark). Lacks upper body strength, straight line speed, runs poor routes. Has average quickness. Rumored to be uncoachable and a locker room disturbance. Character issues: Has been arrested three times since high school. Good hands, can absorb a playbook quickly, but will only "play when I wanna play". Explosive playmaker, sometimes it's as though he's wearing a dynamite and nail-encased vest instead of pads on the field |
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Big dumb ugly looking SOB, probably worthless, should be shipped home on the first bus...
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Height: Average
Weight: too much body fat Speed: timed with calender. Smarts: if he carries a playbook with him on the field, he'll be ok. |
Chiefaroo: Defensive End. - Good lateral quickness but limited by undersized frame and limited strength at this level. Stands no chance at the point of attack at this level. Has great intensity and loves to bring the wood to the quarterback, has all the mental tools needed but will never have the chance to get to the QB as his chest cavity is approximately the same size as a Willie Roaf's thigh.
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"Breakable."
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Scott is a blue-chip beast of a man that will go directly from the college ranks straight into Canton.
Has the strength of a hydraulic press & the technique of an Ascended Master & may well redefine every aspect of the very game itself. The only chink in his game is being dumb as a cold stone, which could hinder his development. Come to think of it, dudes a MAJOR reach. |
as wide as Willie Roaf, but as tall as Doug Flutie. Older than Trent Green, slower than Jordan Black. Could perhaps drive the team bus.
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