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-   -   Other Sports Gladiator 2018 - Round 2, Match 13 - RockChalk versus Fire Me Boy! (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=316763)

tooge 08-13-2018 12:32 PM
Mower will get 10 miles for sure if it's a rider. He will never get the clamshell plastic off though, so FMB should win. Only problem is, FMB has a bum leg right now and there is quite a bit of distance between them. If a very small hole can be opened in the plastic, enough to reach a hand in fire up the mower, then, the PTO should be able to be engaged, as the plastic would be putting pressure on the seat. That should then open a huge hole in the front as the blades tear their way out. THen it'd be pretty easy to pry open, chase down the hobbled FMB, and run his ass down as he hopelessly tries to throw the stars as he hops away, using the baton as a cane. Sorry FMB, but this wont end well

MagicHef 08-13-2018 12:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tooge (Post 13672786)
Mower will get 10 miles for sure if it's a rider. He will never get the clamshell plastic off though, so FMB should win. Only problem is, FMB has a bum leg right now and there is quite a bit of distance between them. If a very small hole can be opened in the plastic, enough to reach a hand in fire up the mower, then, the PTO should be able to be engaged, as the plastic would be putting pressure on the seat. That should then open a huge hole in the front as the blades tear their way out. THen it'd be pretty easy to pry open, chase down the hobbled FMB, and run his ass down as he hopelessly tries to throw the stars as he hops away, using the baton as a cane. Sorry FMB, but this wont end well
It's the baton in the clamshell, not the mower.

LoneWolf 08-13-2018 12:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tooge (Post 13672786)
Mower will get 10 miles for sure if it's a rider. He will never get the clamshell plastic off though, so FMB should win. Only problem is, FMB has a bum leg right now and there is quite a bit of distance between them. If a very small hole can be opened in the plastic, enough to reach a hand in fire up the mower, then, the PTO should be able to be engaged, as the plastic would be putting pressure on the seat. That should then open a huge hole in the front as the blades tear their way out. THen it'd be pretty easy to pry open, chase down the hobbled FMB, and run his ass down as he hopelessly tries to throw the stars as he hops away, using the baton as a cane. Sorry FMB, but this wont end well
Huh? I think you need to read the OP again.

Fire Me Boy! 08-13-2018 12:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tooge (Post 13672786)
Mower will get 10 miles for sure if it's a rider. He will never get the clamshell plastic off though, so FMB should win. Only problem is, FMB has a bum leg right now and there is quite a bit of distance between them. If a very small hole can be opened in the plastic, enough to reach a hand in fire up the mower, then, the PTO should be able to be engaged, as the plastic would be putting pressure on the seat. That should then open a huge hole in the front as the blades tear their way out. THen it'd be pretty easy to pry open, chase down the hobbled FMB, and run his ass down as he hopelessly tries to throw the stars as he hops away, using the baton as a cane. Sorry FMB, but this wont end well
I'm still blood doping from last round. My feet are fine.

I use the throwing starts to open the baton clamshell. The mower falls over in the terrain less than a mile in. I beat RockChalk to death with the baton.

Rain Man 08-13-2018 12:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shag (Post 13672767)
Likely impossible without tools. Better bet would be to run the mower into one of those giant head statues, blades first, and hope the blades break into useful weaponry.
That may be a felony on Easter Island. I'll check.

Fire Me Boy! 08-13-2018 12:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 13672807)
That may be a felony on Easter Island. I'll check.
Why should it matter? We're trying to murder each other, after all.

Rain Man 08-13-2018 12:46 PM
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I took this photo when I was there a few years ago. No climbing on the moai. I bet this sign doesn't exist anywhere else in the world.

tooge 08-13-2018 12:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MagicHef (Post 13672793)
It's the baton in the clamshell, not the mower.
oops, my bad. FMB is screwed then. I've had a bitch of a time opening those damned clam shell things with good sheet metal shears, so I'm guesing with "small" throwing stars, that isn't going to be very easy.

Rain Man 08-13-2018 12:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fire Me Boy! (Post 13672810)
Why should it matter? We're trying to murder each other, after all.
Yeah, but murdering each other is not against the rules. You want to be a good citizen and follow the rules.

Rain Man 08-13-2018 12:49 PM
I'm trying to imagine a riding lawn mower hanging from a peg in a hardware store in one of those plastic clamshells. But oddly, I have no doubt that the clamshell could hold it.

LoneWolf 08-13-2018 12:51 PM
What does the baton being in a clam shell matter. Just beat him to death with the clam shell if you can’t get it open in time.

Fire Me Boy! 08-13-2018 12:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tooge (Post 13672820)
oops, my bad. FMB is screwed then. I've had a bitch of a time opening those damned clam shell things with good sheet metal shears, so I'm guesing with "small" throwing stars, that isn't going to be very easy.
Nah, I have no trouble with them if I can get a finger in there. The star will definitely make a big enough hole to rip that ****er open.

tooge 08-13-2018 12:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 13672824)
I'm trying to imagine a riding lawn mower hanging from a peg in a hardware store in one of those plastic clamshells. But oddly, I have no doubt that the clamshell could hold it.
I guess the OP didn't specify, does the clamshell wrapping also include several little wires tied around various mower parts and twisted tight to the wrapping? If so, then yes, FMB would win.

Fire Me Boy! 08-13-2018 12:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LoneWolf (Post 13672827)
What does the baton being in a clam shell matter. Just beat him to death with the clam shell if you can’t get it open in time.
That's actually a really good point. Those things can be sharp, too.

Rain Man 08-13-2018 12:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fire Me Boy! (Post 13672832)
That's actually a really good point. Those things can be sharp, too.
But the clamshell would be bigger than the baton and hard to get a grip on. You couldn't beat a person with it very well.

Good point on the sharp edges, though. A partially opened clamshell will shear the head off of a gazelle.


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