Heh... no, but I'll check.

:doh!: Nevermind... I see it.

Come on...this is the "Official Offensive Joke Thread"...everyone's been warned before they opened it, so unleash your worst! Besides, laughter makes people live longer, or so the legend goes...

OH, SNAP.

Q: Why was Helen Keller unable to drive?

A: Because she was a woman



Q: What did the carrot say to the n*gger?

A: fuck you



Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?

A: My girlfriend and I have never had butt sex

Joke 1: An Irishman walked out of a bar.




Joke 2: He was followed by a Scottsman.

Q: How many dead babies can fit in a barrel?

A: 4 1/2.



Q: What is pink and red and sits in a corner?

A: A baby chewing on razor blades.



Q: What is green and sits in a corner?

A: The same baby, six weeks later.

Q: How do you prepare a dead baby for Valentine's Day?

A: You shove a box of chocolates down his throat and a
bouquet of roses up his ass.



Q: What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ?

A: A Pedophiles ass.



Q: What's worse than smoking pot with a baby?

A: Making a bong out of it

How do you prevent a baby from exploding in the microwave?
Poke holes in it with a coat hanger

How do you get a baby to run faster?
Chase it with the lawn mower.

What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor?
An erection.

Eh, the last time I posted a joke on a similar thread, I posted the EXACT same joke as the one in the thread starter.

It it inspired about 100 angry posts. (Atually about half of those were Baby Lee defending me...)

A little boy ask his mother for a bicycle but she refuses because of his bad behavior. She suggests that he spend more time praying and talking to Jesus so that he may become more Christian. She tells him that if that happens Jesus will make sure that he gets his bicycle.
Every day for a week the boy comes home and goes straight to his room and prays. His mother is quite impressed. He asks if he has been good enough to get his bicycle and she tells him that part of being a Christian is showing patience.
The whole next week he comes home and prays and at the end of the week he asks his mother again for the bicycle. His mother again tells him to be continue to be patient. After hearing this the little boy grabs his coat and starts for the door. When his mother asks where he is going he tells her that he is going to church to talk to Jesus.
A few hours later his mother walks into his room to find him with a statue of the Virgin Mary from their church. She looks over the boys shoulder and sees a note that he is writing. It reads, "Dear Jesus, I got your fuckin' momma. If you want to see here again you'll bring me my new bicycle."

Shortly after the crash that killed Princess Di, Dodi Fayed meets up with Henri Paul in heaven. He turns to him and says, "you fuckin' @sshole. I told you that I wanted to fuck Di in the tunnel. Not fuckin' die in the tunnel."

bump for the perverts on CP today

What 3 things can you not give a negro?

A black eye, a fat lip, and a job.

Alright, so there's a lot more PETA crap out there right now, but there are two in particular that inspired this....

The first is a dog on a plate (a chihuahua to be exact) and the words "You Eat Other Animals, Don't You?" (couldn't find a picture of this on the internet yet, so if it pops up, please post it)

The second is a dog chewing on a fish that's still hooked to the fishing pole with the words "You wouldn't do this to your dog, so why do it to a fish?" (Picture below)

What came after seeing this is pretty nasty (and a bit offensive to some people, but I believe that this thread proves that most funny things are offensive, right? :shurg: )....my oldest brother came up with the idea, and I did the photoshop work. The parody organization shall be called "People for the Ethical Treatment of People." (Picture Below)

The following is not for the weak-stomached...you've been warned.










...

I'm just posting on this thread because I love Jessica Simpson's avatar... :thumb: