Amazingly it appears this was a bad call. Who would have believed there could be something worse?

Yeah, not my best work there.

Time to go watch a movie I think.

Do you like pizza, XLUBITSCELFANDI?

THIS EXISTS AS AN EXCELLENT QUESTION, TK13. ALAS, MY SPECIES GREATEST MINDS HAVE DEVOTED THEIR LIVING TO ACQUIRING THE SOLUTION TO YOUR INQUIRY, AND HAVE REACHED NO ANSWERING. I SHOULD INFORM TK13 THAT ON MY HOME PLANETOID OF FLIXRAN, WE LABEL YOUR "TOOTSIE ROLL POP" as "GRISHCLOR SIMSOXE."

PSICOSIS, THE MONIKER OF I IS XLIBUTSCRALE. PLEASE CORRECT FUTURE STATEMENTS OR I WILL BE FORCED TO ATOMIZE YOUR STATE. MANY THANKINGS.

XLIBUTSCRALE, a few of our species are weaker than the rest. These pitiful beings, in their early years, provide amusement for the strong by taking their rightful place as the center of cruel jokes and giving up their midday nourishment allowances after physical assault. As these sad creatures grow into a state of submaturity (they never reach full maturity, flawed as they are), they become paranoid, unable form interpersonal relationships, and upset the delicate balance of the species.

A far advanced species, such as yours, must have some way of eliminating these types. Do your people identify and eliminate them early in their lives, or wait until later to destroy them?

Would you please demonstrate the means your species uses to eliminate such undesirables? Feel free to use the candidate there in the room with you.

Thank you.

Wow, all we need now is to get this guy in some kind of writing competition with TommyKat, Kcnut, drunk kotter and skinbra.

TRNDOBRD, MANY THANKS FOR YOUR QUESTIONAIRE.

UNFORTUNATELY DUE TO INTERSTELLAR TRAVEL I HAVE BEEN ABSENT FROM MY HOMEWORLD OF FLIXRAN FOR MANY YEARS. TIMES MAY HAVE CHANGED.

TO ANSWER YOUR INQUIRY, I CAN ONLY RESPOND WITH MY PREVIOUS EXPERIENCES. YOU SEE, I USED TO BE ONE OF THESE "PITIFUL BEINGS," OR AS WE REFER TO THEM ON FLIXRAN, "ENWOT PIKS." WE WOULD CLEANSE OUR NOBLE SOCIETY OF THESE DREGS BY PUTTING THEM TO WORK IN ZOPRANG MINES. FORTUNATELY I ESCAPED FROM THIS LIFE AND AM NOW A SUCCESSFUL GALAXIAL EXPLORER.

IT IS WITH REGRET THAT I CANNOT USE MY GRACIOUS EARTHLING HOST TO DEMONSTRATE OUR CUSTOM TO YOU. BESIDES, HE IS NOT A VERY GOOD REPRESENTATION ONE OF OUR ENWOT PIKS.

IT IS MY HOPING THAT I HAVE SATISFIED YOU.

ALSO THIS "PEPSI" BEVERAGE YOU EARTHLINGS CONSUME IS QUITE TASTY. MY COMPLIMENTS TO YOUR TERRAN CHEFS.

ELBORRACHO, I HAVE BEEN HAMPERED BY USE OF YOUR PRIMITIVE COMMUNICATION INSTRUMENTS (WE FLIXRANS TRADITIONALLY COMMUNICATE VIA PURE THOUGHT), BUT I HAVE ADAPTED QUITE QUICKLY, WOULDN'T YOU CONCUR?

ROFL Wow.

I am most pleased that you enjoy our "pepsi". It is best enjoyed with another Earth beverage known as Captain Morgan Spiced Rum. The subhuman creature in the room with you was trying to hide that information from you.

Being new to our humble planet, you have not had a full opportunity to judge our species. Please, rest assured, the being in the room with you is among the foulest of what you would call "ENWOT PIKS". The eternal friendship of our peoples would be secure if you would be so kind as to rid our planet of this creature.

Humanity thanks you in advance.

Someone should really make sure Skip gets this one.

MANY THANKS FOR YOUR CULINARY ADVICE, EARTHLING. MY HOST HAS HIDDEN NOTHING FROM ME, AS MY SPACECRAFT'S SENSOR CATALOGUED HIS FOOD AND BEVERAGE INVENTORY FROM ORBIT. I TAKE IT THIS "RUM" IS A FORM OF MIND-ALTERING SUBSTANCE. SUCH A DEVICE IS LETHAL TO OUR KIND. WE PREFER PURE DISTILLED FLIXRANSIAN RAIN TO, AS YOUR KIND SAYS, "GET US HIGH."

YOUR REQUEST MAY BE FILLED, ALTHOUGH PERHAPS NOT IN THE MANNER YOU WISH. MY HOST'S ADVANCED BRAIN HAS INTRIGUED MY SUPERIORS ON FLIXRAN AND THEY DESIRE HIS PRESENCE FOR STUDY. MY HOST HAS INDICATED HE WOULD BE HONORED, PROVIDED WE SKIP THE ANAL PROBING.

that actually was humorous

As you wish. As a representative of the Planet Earth, please take the pitiful little creature with you as a token of our esteem and friendship. May discecting his brain provide you many moments of enjoyment.

It is said by some, that a tenth of the Earth people do not find the anal probing distrubing. The creature in your presence may be one of these. It is also possible he is attempting to hide other things from you. I suggest you utilize your largest probe to investigate these matters futher.