The thing about it is, what if you had watched the news that night or the next and you see a picture of that kid and he's gone missing? I'd probably risk it and make sure he got home safe.

That is good news Rainman and i'm proud of you, as should the rest of CP as well.

I'd give the kid a ride home...

are you kidding me???

Wow. If a 7 year old kid needs a ride home I'm giving him one...if it's some desperate ploy or money play by the parents to try and get the kid to call rape then ****...I guess I walked into that trap...

but I'm not going to tell a 7 year old "tough luck" when they need help...especially if it just requires a short 5 minute ride home.

That's just insane.

and when we got to his house I'd walk up to the front door and make sure his/her parents knew what had happened and tell them to, I don't know, try and keep a better eye on their freaking kid.

If I thought everything through clearly, I would have called 911 to have the kid picked up, regardless if that was what he wanted or not.

he's freaking 7 years old...

I would have put him in the backseat of my car, driven him to his house, went up to the front door and knocked...

If the parents answered, I would have explained to them what had happened and told them I'm glad I didn't have to get the police involved...

If they didn't answer, I guess I would have stayed right there and then called the police and left it in their hands.

I'm sorry to be the one to break it to you, Mr. Rain Man, but this is actually the latest insidious scheme in the world of midget crime. That "3 year-old" you encountered was actually a midget pretending to be a little girl. Her "parents" were midget accomplices. You did not save a little girl. Rather, you inadvertently foiled an ingenious midget plot to steal the contents of the cash register and an untold number of Cinnabons. Had the midget been caught in the act by the Cinnabon girl, the "parents" were in the mall to help the midget escape justice.

In future, the best thing to do in a situation like this is to approach the midget as though you were offering candy in order to gain the midget's trust. Once you have sufficiently neared the midget, you then beat the midget mercilessly and repeatedly upon the top of the head with a chair or laptop computer or other solid object until the police arrive.

FAX

Dude this is screwed up...on your part.

I think you should take all the money you make writing about pro football and buy yourself an ice cream truck.

Somehow you seem like the kind of guy who would drive an ice cream truck around the block, and around the block, and around...

Juneau is cool. The only state capitol you can't drive to. (For those unfamiliar: it's got mountains on one side and water on the other, and is not connected by road to any other city. Everything has to be shipped or flown in.) Many people also don't realize it's technically a rainforest so they don't get a whole lot of snow; people just assume "Alaska = ten feet of snow every year".

I made the difference in the life of a child today. Some kid rang my doorbell, said he wanted to use my phone because the guy down the street wouldn't give him a ride home. So I dragged him in the house and chained him in the basement and did things he'll need years of therapy to get over.


























What, you perverts? I just made him watch a lot of Herm Edwards press conferences. :shrug:

We prefer "Little People" there FAX.
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"Little" is an insulting diminutive. Vertically-challenged.

You could have walked him home, to ensure he made it safely. I don't blame you for not driving him home. I would probably flip out a tad being a parent, if a stranger drove my child home. It would be my child I flip out on, however, not very bright on the kids part, even asking.

I wonder where the parents were anyway?

Cinnabon cereal cracks the top 50, at least.

Dude...douche move.