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-   -   Poop Late night bullshit: ChiefsPlanet Dungeons & Dragons (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=274475)

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Planetman (Post 9806663)
Using my natural elven abilities, I am checking this thread for traps. (please roll a 6 sided die. A result of 1 or 2 means I have succeeded)
(Done.)

***3***

I'm sorry. You have done your job diligently, but there remain traps in this thread that you have yet to detect.

Simply Red 07-11-2013 10:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806659)
Oh man. You'll have to be free tonight, and have been fortunate enough for luv to be on a softball team.

Hard to tell what the difficulty of this is. I'll put it at a square 12. The stars kinda need to align on this.

***17***

You have successfully secured a comfortable seat on a bleacher in Springfield, just as luv is taking the field for a beer league softball game.

As it turns out, her game is modest. She's not exactly rapturing your attention, but then again she isn't shitting herself out there, either.
well heck - how is luv's team overall - strengths? weakness? ranking? Does luv have any dingers? What do they sell to eat there? .. I'm starving and low on stamina. What's her team's name?

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:24 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simply Red (Post 9806668)
since i'm in Springfield - i'd like to approach Mohillbilly's house with this to protect myself - how much is this new age trident?

http://i44.tinypic.com/oh7qtd.gif
That trident is not for sale.

Get out of here. I have no patience for metrosexuals with semiautomatic weapons.

It's not safe.

Simply Red 07-11-2013 10:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 9806660)
I seek allies to enter a quest for the Fountain of Sulfa, in the land of Cenipillin.
I'm good with this here. I'd like to visit my wizard old time friend, prior. I need his wisdom before our travels.

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simply Red (Post 9806673)
well heck - how is luv's team overall - strengths? weakness? ranking? Does luv have any dingers? What do they sell to eat there? .. I'm starving and low on stamina. What's her team's name?
Her team's alright. She's about par for their talent level.

They're weak-armed in the outfield, unfortunately. Luv is completely healthy, however.

They only sell a paste at this particular ball park for food, a lot like astronaut's food. It is low on flavor but high on nutrients. It can only be ingested anally... just so you know.

I do not know what her team name is.

Simply Red 07-11-2013 10:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806675)
That trident is not for sale.

Get out of here. I have no patience for metrosexuals with semiautomatic weapons.

It's not safe.
Gosh Dammit!

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simply Red (Post 9806677)
I'm good with this here. I'd like to visit my wizard old time friend, prior. I need his wisdom before our travels.
I'm not sure what this means, but I'm going to interpret it as meaning you are traveling with Rain Man and an unnamed wizard.

Planetman 07-11-2013 10:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806671)
(Done.)

***3***

I'm sorry. You have done your job diligently, but there remain traps in this thread that you have yet to detect.
Convinced this is Hootie's fault, I put on my +3 vorpal steel toed boots of nut removal and kick Hootie in the junk. (result of my action please)

Simply Red 07-11-2013 10:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806680)
I'm not sure what this means, but I'm going to interpret it as meaning you are traveling with Rain Man and an unnamed wizard.
i'm going to see the wizard - he's offering up his wisdom - lands to avoid - berries to not eat. He live's in an invisible mountain range and his name is Shelvvandolch Nellsiddl. He makes the mountains visable as I approach, however I'm the only one who can see them. He's nestled in a spot only I know. For I'm his 'chosen one' his warrior in armor - I'm the one that will make the difference when the thread is complete and we've all taken our journeys.

There is nothing more real than this moment right here. & I'm the one to watch out for.

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Planetman (Post 9806683)
Convinced this is Hootie's fault, I put on my +3 vorpal steel toed boots of nut removal and kick Hootie in the junk. (result of my action please)
Oh man. This is tough. Hootie is pretty quick, and he'll likely drop his pants anyway to avert a physical confrontation -- because that actually works.

However, based on your resolve and your eminently powerful boots, it all equalizes to about an 8 out of 20.

***7***

Unbelievable. You took a royal swing but Hootie's too ****ing quick.

You did give him a wicked Charlie horse in his thigh, however. Hootie writhes on the ground as he struggles to get to his knees.

"Your outlook for 2014 is going to be SHIT," he whines.

TLO 07-11-2013 10:33 PM
lol wut?

Direckshun 07-11-2013 10:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Simply Red (Post 9806690)
i'm going to see the wizard - he's offering up his wisdom - lands to avoid - berries to not eat. He live's in an invisible mountain range and his name is Shelvvandolch Nellsiddl. He makes the mountains visable as I approach, however I'm the only one who can see them. He's nestled in a spot only I know. For I'm his 'chosen one' his warrior in armor - I'm the one that will make the difference when the thread is completed and we've all taken our journeys.

There is nothing more real than this moment right here. & I'm the one to watch out for.
I have the weirdest boner.

Simply Red 07-11-2013 10:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806691)
Oh man. This is tough. Hootie is pretty quick, and he'll likely drop his pants anyway to avert a physical confrontation -- because that actually works.

However, based on your resolve and your eminently powerful boots, it all equalizes to about an 8 out of 20.

***7***

Unbelievable. You took a royal swing but Hootie's too ****ing quick.

You did give him a wicked Charlie horse in his thigh, however. Hootie writhes on the ground as he struggles to get to his knees.

"Your outlook for 2014 is going to be SHIT," he whines.

ROFL i thought that was cute.

Planetman 07-11-2013 10:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Direckshun (Post 9806691)
Oh man. This is tough. Hootie is pretty quick, and he'll likely drop his pants anyway to avert a physical confrontation -- because that actually works.

However, based on your resolve and your eminently powerful boots, it all equalizes to about an 8 out of 20.

***7***

Unbelievable. You took a royal swing but Hootie's too ****ing quick.

You did give him a wicked Charlie horse in his thigh, however. Hootie writhes on the ground as he struggles to get to his knees.

"Your outlook for 2014 is going to be SHIT," he whines.
ROFL

While Hootie is still writing on the ground I teleport from the area, in hopes of meeting up with a group of hearty adventurers such as myself. Perhaps a warrior carrying an automatic weapon and man in search of a wizard. :hmmm:

TLO 07-11-2013 10:40 PM
I want to have sex with a random chick tonight.


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