Q. Why do you wrap duct tape around a hamster?

A. So that it doesn't split when you F@ck it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I used to be a necrophiliac until some rotten c@nt split on me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse.
He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left.
He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life.
Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"

A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labour is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth.
"I'm afraid I don't have a husband" she replies.
"O.K. do you have a boyfriend?" asks the Midwife.
"No, no boyfriend either."
"Do you have a partner then?"
"No, I'm unattached, I'll be having my baby on my own."
After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman.
"You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that the baby is black"
"Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a Porno movie. The lead man was black."
"Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair."
"Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what else could I do?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my business and I hate to pry further but your baby has asian eyes."
"Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was a little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice."
At this the midwife again apologises collects the baby and presents her to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the bum. The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Thank God for that!" "What do you mean?" says the midwife, shocked.
"WHEW!" says the girl extremely relieved...
"I had this horrible feeling that it was going to bark!"

i miss Red ..... cli(n)t you bastige!!!



:deevee: :deevee:

and getting around the wheelchair...

You know why black people don't go to Church's around here?

because all we have is KFC & Popeyes

Why do you put a baby feet first into the blender?

So you can cum on its face as it dies.

How do you keep a dog from humping your leg?



Pick it up and suck its dick!

What's nastier than a pile of dead babies?



One at the bottom eating its way out.

what's the best thing about an 8 yr old girl in the shower?

if you slick her hair back she looks like a 6 yr old boy.

I'm sorry :shake:

Herm Edwards is the Chiefs HC.

Q: What do you say to a battered woman with two black eyes?


A: Nuthin', the bitch done been told twice

A black child was sent to heaven
and the black child met an angel with wings
the angel then gave the black child wings also
the black child asked if these wings made him an angel too
the angel responded

"Nah n**ga, you a bat!"

-How many black guys does it take to shingle a roof?
-It depends on how thin you slice them


-What is white and 9" long?
-Nothing

-Why does a Mexican eat Tomales for Christmas?
-So they have something to unwrap

-What do you say to a black jew?
-Get in the Back of the oven!

-Did you hear about the jewish child molestor?
-He hid in the bushes and said, "Hey little boy, wanna buy some candy?"

-What's the difference between a black man and a snow tire?
-A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it.

-What starts with an N and ends with an R that you never want to call a black person?
-Neighbor

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man?

A pizza can feed a family of 4.