Rolling on, we GIF up the Dallas game.

We start by focusing on Branden Albert, who is being extensively gif'd up for the second time this year. He got owned and owned again. This is his second shitty game. He was our initial GIFEE and he hasn't improved much. DeMarcus Ware took him to school and Albert didn't even finish the game, of course, as he got hurt.

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Runner up for ultimate offensive failure against Dallas was Sean Ryan.


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GIF'D UP welcomes Ryan O'Failaghan!

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Let's have a big hand for Mike Goof!

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This is just flat out pure ownage by Jay Ratliff. I think LJ called Rudy a bundle of sticks after this play.

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Later this AM:Miles Austin ****s everybody up.

Holy...shit...

Wow, our whole OL just sucks. I mean, I already knew that, but seeing it replayed is disheartening.

Its hard to re watch thats for sure...:banghead:

Sean Ryan needs to go. Penalties, Poor Blocking and no threat in the passing game what so ever.

Stats inc still has Albert as only giving up 4.5 sacks. That's the same number as a few weeks ago.

It's hard to give up sacks when your ass is on the bench.

How many did he give up against Dallas? I thought they had him with 4.5 prior to Dallas.

No idea. But he's lucky Cassel can run.

Some organization should start keep track of pressures allowed. This thread might give us a decent idea, though.

That's sickening to watch.

Those guys are making at least $310,000.00 for that crap. I don't know how they can watch that game film with their colleagues without shame. In a couple of those gifs, they looked about as agile as my 5 year old daughter...

Suck O Rama.
On so many levels.

Props to GoChiefs for pulling those gif's. Very well done.

Excellent work as has been the case from the OP on by far the best thread on this site hands down.

Epic thread is epic.

Jesus Christmas that's terrible. How have we not given up even MORE sacks?!?

'cause Cassel has some shifty moves!

I know people don't like Cassel, but I'm not sure how you can properly evaluate a QB that KNOWS he's going to get blasted every time he drops back to pass (even on three-step drops).

Really, I think this shows he's tough and can move. Give the man a line, and see what he does then.

LMAO @ "Carbombs, potatoes, blarney stones".

OK, hold up. Defense coming...

Gif up some Cassell if you can too, just want to know if he really does suck or if it's the line, or both...or neither...or Gaz...

Defensively, we'll start out with some more positive plays from Glenn Dorsey. It's pretty clear now he's becoming a player on defense.


Look at his run defense:

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Look at his mother****ing pass rush:

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Good for Glenn Dorsey. He's showing up every week now in this thread recently.



Another guy who's starting to show up is Mike Brown. This play was called back by penalty, but it's still some Pollard-esque shit.

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Also, Corey Mays seems to consistently miss a tackle or two every game.

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Tamba Hali would have more sacks if he was a better player.

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Jarrad Page begins the Miles Austin glut.

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Maurice Leggett Fail Theater Premier!

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Mo has a co-star in this one.

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And here's the dynamic duo once again!

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Unless he can GIF the entire field and show open receivers getting no looks, you can't really see the true scope of Cassel's FAIL.

This is true, but seeing the amount of pressure and how he escapes from it would be good to get a look at too...

ASS WHIP OF THE WEEK: Brandon Flowers

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ASS WHIPEE OF THE WEEK: Bobby Wade

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Runner Up: Da Chicago Way

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Ref Ownage:

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Tomorrow: Redskins

Man, our safety play is dog crap. Pollard couldn't have been worse than these clowns.

I agree. All around fail at the safety position.

As the noble and seemingly absent htismaqe once said....less than bad is not equal to good.

At the same time, I wouldn't use our 1 on a safety. Our O-line and WRs are just as bad, if not worse.

As Greg Wesley stares at his phone waiting for it to ring.

Since my date canceled...and I actually canceled BEFORE she canceled...I'm staying in tonight...which means GIF'D UP...ROOOOOOOLLLLLLSSSSSSS ON!

cool be checking back for it

Brian Waters wins the prize this week. Not only did Haynesworth kick his ass all game, he couldn't even block cornerbacks. Brian Waters leads the team in penalties, too. Washed up and GIF'D UP!!!

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Of course the rest of the OL is also at fault. Mike Goff, for instance, single-handedly destroys this running play.

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Here's his good buddy Wade Smith filling in at left tackle.

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Here's Rudy, thinking about bypass surgery or something.

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Big Irish actually had a very good game...except for this shit.

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And here's everyone sucking shit, which is basically a sequel to that play in the Philly game.

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Next: defense!

Oh, I almost forgot the rest of the offense.

Sean Ryan? Sucks.

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Matt Cassel? Dumbass!

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D-Bowe? Weaksauce! And Cassel could have scored on a naked boot here.

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Great work as always. Can't WAIT for SD.

It would seem that most CPers are off having a life tonight. So here's Ron Edwards kicking ass!

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And here is Dorsey kicking ass, with an awesome CLUB, and also getting tackled.

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Now for the bad news...

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We finish with the ass whippings.

OK, we have a lot of asses being whipped this week. First, Mark Bradley, who doesn't play according to Dane McCloud.

ASS WHIP OF THE WEEK: Mark Bradley

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Then we have three guys getting their asses kicked. Not sure who wins, but I think Belcher got laid out the worst.

ASS WHIPEES OF THE WEEK: Belcher, Cassel, McGraw.

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too bad bowe had to drop that pass on the bradley gif. so sad i wonder what he could've done had he caught it

Thanks for your work on these Gif's GoChiefs. I really enjoy this thread. Not everyone has a life tonight...I just frickin got off work, just chilling with my planeteers to unwind. Percocets and beer help too. Anyway, thanks for the gif's. Nice to see Dorsey is not just on the field as a trading showcase (that last according to Yahoo Sports).

He definitely failed all of the way off of the cliff on a few, but looked pretty solid in several as well, in post 353 gif#1, he pulls a nifty hopstep to his right to pick up his man & does a better job of it than Waters while he was at it.

He has some dancing bear run block qualities, who knows?... Wade at center, get Goof the hell outta there & we might have an NFL caliber center right line.

These are amusive and incredibly depressing at the same time.

Who told her she was allowed to wear a bra.:drool:

Seriously, if I was Cassell, I'd be getting the hell out of town. If these assholes aren't willing to block, I'm not willing to stand in the pocket and try to play football.

This. I was actually in support of picking mays but we need the best OT that comes out. Huge value pick for us. I'm gonna go shoot myself in the head now.

I'm working on it but these linemen aren't cheap to bribe; the cost of transferring the money through ghost accounts is expensive, and I'm running out of funds.


Wait; you didn't hear that.:evil:

Cassel has taken some HORRIFIC abuse this year, whether he's worth the money or not is certainly up in the air... but the guy is damn sure trying to earn it.

The 'Helloween Gravedigger' gif is just one of MANY like that he's taken this year... only to shake it off & keep playing. This guy wants to be a baller.

Can he have a minimum pro quality line & someone else besides Bowe to make a play or drop an easy pass, before rendering Final Judgement?

No :D

Looks like Bowe was more interested in the Ass Whip than catching the football.

Easily distracted. Not a good sign.

Memo from The Great Haoli:

"No more shiny objects on the field people; suspensions and fines".

Anyone care to give a quick lesson on how to make GIFs?

Man the O really really sucks....everyone

It's really strange to see how badly a pro lineman can miss his block. The defender is right in front of you. How in the F do you slant right or left and then completely miss the guy RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!

It almost looks like their trying to fail.

And the safeties are terrible. I'd like to see Morgan out there. He might also be terrible but doesn't he have some speed?

This thread is a definite shoe in for the hall of classics! Awesome job!

A few key things to keep in mind. In most of those sacks, Cassel looked at at least 2-3 options. And while the gifs are in slower motion, no doubt he took each of those sacks within 3-5 seconds. Goes against the dumb theory that he stares down his primary receiver and that he holds on to the ball too long.

I know those are a small sample. But it seems pretty clear that one of the main reasons he doesn't look to several options is that if he has the gall to look at a second receiver, he usually gets clobbered.

I reviewed the Chargers' game today. There are two particular plays I really like - Sean Ryan getting DESTROYED, and it is not even funny...he gets OBLITERATED. On another play three guys go sliding around trying to stop a screen to Gates. Funny stuff.

Don't go to bed.

GIF'D UP rolls on this AM.

I'm not entirely sure i want to subject myself to this debasery...

Good with the bad *crossy fingers!1!*

How this entire game isnt gif'd is beyond me. In order to shorten the time needed. Show us what went right.

This week GIF'D up focuses on the terrible two: McGraw and Brown. The unsafe safeties. The last line of FAIL.

First, McGraw takes to the air!

http://uranus.ckt.net/%7Egochiefs/chargers/GIF3.gif

Next, Brown intimidates Darren Sproles!

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They meet again! This time, Brown gets a piece of Sproles.

http://uranus.ckt.net/%7Egochiefs/ch.../brownbad2.gif

Here our valiant safety tandem show their "around the ball" skills. More like around the FAIL amirite?

http://uranus.ckt.net/%7Egochiefs/ch.../brownbad3.gif

Finally, Sproles puts the nail in the coffin.

http://uranus.ckt.net/%7Egochiefs/ch...mcgrawbad2.gif




Coming right up: the OL!

Who's that getting decleated in the 4th gif?

Patience. ;)

Here's Mike Goff, doing his little shimmy. It makes all the women in Kansas City puke.

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Oh, well hey there, Wade Smith, just let that safety walk on by!

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Touch me...baby...touch me!

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Annnnnnnd let's just not block these guys.

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LJ shows off his "vision."

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the first one on Goff was against Alphonso Boone

Ndukwe as a Blocking TE on short yardage and GL isn't a bad idea. Looked like he was in position and squared up and got push. Just the RG and C spots got caved in.

Looks to me like he didn't even know his assignment. No one even attempted to block Merriman.

Here's some random ****ery.

First, Cassel Thigpens one.

http://uranus.ckt.net/%7Egochiefs/chargers/caselbad.gif

Charles decides to ignore the guy running in to block the punt.

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Flowers whiffs...badly.

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Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

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saw that. Originally thought it was a 2 back set and Cox's guy. It wasn't. 3 TE and LJ.

I was just encouraged he moved the pile before i saw he blew the outside guy Merriman. Whoever caved the middle and jumped the pile made that play though.

I think Goff's drop in play from what he was is worse than Welbourn's drop in play his last year hear. That's horrible.

It's pretty bad. Makes you appreciate guys like Will Shields and the guy who played for the Oilers all those years...I forget his name.

I hope the Chiefs dump Waters before he reaches Goff's level.

Bruce Matthews

OK, some positive stuff.

Flowers takes LT OUT!

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Morgan playing safety the way it's supposed to be played!

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Larry gets credit for making Merriman LOOK like he got jacked up...he didn't ACTUALLY jack him up, but we will be NICE this once. Patna.

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This is good shit.

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This is as close as any Chief got to whipping any ass.

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I hope the same w/ waters.

I hope tommorrow Goff is inactive. He was added w/ a shoulder on thurs. Listed as Q and limited in practice the last two days. Gonna be an interesting inactive list tommorrow. 2 new WR's. Long had a role as a Slot guy and st's guy. Now Chambers will get some plays if not this week next and Wade can slide to the slot. With copper one of the main special teams guys i suppose Bradley is the odd man out and inactive since Engram is gone.

Who knows if he has improved in practice or not but i would like to see Cottam for 1 game at least to see if he can block yet.

great shed and holding his ground by Dorsey. Dielman is no slouch.

Like I said, that was as close as any Chief got to whipping any ass.

NO ONE whipped any ass against the Chargers.

But Thomas Gafford and Sean Ryan got they asses whipped FO SHO!

ASS WHIPEES OFF THE WEEK: Thomas Gafford and Sean Ryan!

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See you bitches NEXT WEEK!

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Can we please cut Sean Ryan and Mike Goff, just on general ****ing principle. They have to be the two worst players in the NFL starting at their positions.

But...but...Sean Ryan has excellent pass catching skills...

Bruce Matthews?

Sean Ryan and Goff are CONSISTENTLY contributing to GIF'D up. The coaches should see these GIF's just so they know, we know, and can't try to pass them off as players next season.

"Credited for one shoe tackle"

LMAO

Excellent work as always.