Good God. Just go ahead and **** that big titted cum dumpster.

Come on, brah. Make it happen. No excuses about anything.

I literally asked her "is that by the graveyard," and she remained horny.

Maybe I can **** her IN a graveyard?

So, tell me about Mexi-Milfs.

When you say MILF, do you mean she birthed a child, or just a hot older bitch?

She has birthed a child. We're dealing with a true MILF.

DADDY!

Whatever. I can deal with kids as long as I'm getting laid.

Ahh, brah. You got it made in the shade.

Honestly, every latin MILF I have been involved with has a negative body image. Whether they are smoking hot with like one stretch mark or not.

That is an easy exploit since you have recently lost weight. You can relate if she throws up that last speed bump on the pussy super speedway.

What sort of speed bump?

The negative body image...

Multiple objections can come from such a condition. But hey, you are a little shy about your body too, so you just relate for 30 seconds and then break her. Unless you prematurely ejaculate.

If you know a chick is insecure about her body, the key is to make her feel comfortable. Don't make too big of a deal out of it, but definitely compliment her on it.

This. Clayton shows off some of his remaining fat suit and she feels comfortable.

I think a horny MILF is the perfect landing pad for our hero.

Actually definitely better not to compliment her on her body especially if she does look good. I kinda like if she asks to act like I hadn't really thought about it then give her a slow look over and say well.........

Then make her drag anything further out of me. Like I'm just not sure how you'll look without clothes? Will I be pleasantly surprised?

I personally don't tell women they're hot. If I'm asking you out and whatnot, it should be a given. I don't know if women go for this or not. But I don't like just buttering women up. It seems like whenever I'm nice and give compliments, I end up becoming their emotional tampon, and best friend. Uh... no.

Tell she's hot when you're baows deep.

It's better to compliment a girl about something other than looks. For example, compliment what she's wearing or her hairstyle. Leave the looks for later.

I was thinking after the clothes are off, hon. Make her feel good about herself.

Really? What if she is kinda arrogant about her body? Then should you tell her she has a big ass?

I'm kidding. But I don't ever compliment a girl on her looks. I don't see them telling me I'm hot, so screw em!

Do you enjoy being submissive in bed? Worship her ass. But not until the sex begins. Treat her as your sex queen.

No worshiping of the ass, either before, during of after sex. If my actions of fucking her doesn't tell her what I think of her body, then she's not gonna get it.

And I don't really care if I'm dominant or submissive. Whatever makes her happy.

She'll be happy if you erect a shrine to her ass with your penis.

Don't kid yourself, little pardner.

If she undresses you just right, all she'll need is a paper towel to wipe off her hands.

I do, however, wish you the best.

Dinny

Quickest way to the friend zone and with women there is no escape...

So now I don't. Screw that. I don't EVER compliment a woman. It is not my JOB to make them feel better. I may not know how to get lots of women, but I have learned a few things.

Pretty much. I receive way more compliments than I give.. which isn't ideal either.

Whoa buddy I wouldnt ever say never compliment them, you just got to do it at the right times.

OK we are on the same page. Actually if the girl isn't the most insecure person ever its fun to say something like you know you aren't half as revolting as you said your were. Assuming she had some self deprecating things to say about herself and can take a joke.

I once told a girl that her approval seeking and cries for attention were only overshadowed by her appalling physical appearance. And it worked :)

I think you have to be fun to be around and the back and forth can be quite fun and great flirting. Mer is really good at playing the ying to my yang so to speak. If she was 15 years older I might jump in on a few of her posts. She hits my funny bone just right.

You never compliment women? You know absolutely zero about us.

So do women actually. But yes a sprinkling of compliments is fine. Overdoing it is the total kiss of death.

Overdoing it does make us feel uncomfortable, but none at all?

Also woman are looking for men who are masculine. Nothing says big wuss than a needy approval seeking man. Big turnoff for woman whether you admit it or not.

But I agree maybe one compliment a night. I like to walk next to a girl and then randomly kind of try to shoulder push her into a tree or light post that always is fun :) My favorite is to tell her she's a dork.

You get the right girl and the back and forth is awesome.

Chirst it'd like gochiefs at square one.

No this dude thinks about it way too much.

EVERY TIME I DO, you turn into friends. Sorry.

I'll tell a girl she's cool, but nothing specific. I know women love compliments, but compliments don't get you girlfriends.

I think too much too. I have ADD, I guess.

But if I stop thinking, I turn into a doormat.

If I had received 1% of the advice Clay has gotten in his time on this site, I'd have scored at least 1000x more often. You can lead a horse to water but you're not strong enough to hold his head under for a sufficient time.

Its kind of like golf, though. You can totally psych yourself out and overthink things. But yet, if you don't think at all, even worse stuff happens. You have to keep your head in this certain free, confident zone that's very hard to achieve for some.

As a child I grew up near a grown man who lived with his mother and his grandmother. David rarely left the house.

As I grew taller and he older, David left his house less and less often. He was ghastly white. His skin glowed. No, really. Poor David. Such a strange, strange fellow.

The point of this illustration is that even David enjoyed sex regularly.

.................:(:(:(:D:D:D:D
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:D :D :D

You're fun.

Turns out Mr Text is only looking for a FWB "with the possibility of something more". :rolleyes: Hold the BS. I'm not stupid.

Good to know up front instead of later. Nice work.

I see Claythan is talking about orange people...so you tried to screw Hulk Hogan?

I couldn't even get him to friggin' call me. He just kept texting. I HATE that.

Lots of people don't like talking on the phone.

You should have said:

I just don't see the point in carrying out what would have been a 5-10 minute conversation for 30-45 minutes by texting.

Acceptable text:

person a: Meeting at "wherever" at "whatever time"?
person b: Yes.
person a (optional): Got it. See you there.

Unacceptable text:

person a: Are you shy or wild? Do you like getting your freak on?

Maybe he was talking to several women at once...

That's me. I'll go out of my way to text someone if it means I don't have to call them.


hmmmm... Wonder if thats a product of growing up on the Internet.
I must climb something and think about this.

Nothing and I mean nothing pisses me off more when someone calls me when I'm doing something and I'm just going "yea uh huh" not really paying attention and they go "are you paying attention" and I will say "I just told you, you called when I was doing something so honestly no I'm not paying attention"

There are a few things that piss me off more, but I'm on your side. I like being able to respond when I feel like it, not when the other person feels like it.

He told me to text him. I did. I just can't stand entire conversations via text. It's annoying. I don't mind texting initially, say to find out if a person has time to talk for a few minutes.

I hate talking on the phone, but I don't think it has anything to do with the internet; I was like that long before darpanet went worldwide.

First time I made a modem connection I was 12. My username was "Silly Kitty." I was never big on the phone before then, but I was 12. Who the hell was I going to call?? I just saw everyone I knew at school.

That's like putting it on a tee for me. You're lucky I have to get ready for work.

You strike such tantilizing fear into me that the cold sweat from my back has pooled with the moistness in my nether regions making it quite unclear where my neck starts and my clit begins.

:eek:

This. Especially if it's someone I don't know well.

So you get to know them via text? You make all of your plans for your next date via text? How impersonal.

Thats how it worked for the last 2 boyfriends.

I should get a text plan, then... :-(

I tried to avoid it as long as I could, but EVERYONE texts now. Even older people!

I'm never going to be successful at dating. I don't play head games, and I'm too impatient to text an entire conversation.

I can't help you with the first part, but I suggest a QWERTY keyboard on your new phone. :-)

I keep seeing that when I look at new phones. I should look up exactly what it is.

I don't know how to text. I hope nobody teaches me.

No, I don't sit there and conduct a complete conversation via text. Just vital info. The whole point is if I don't know you well (and I want to) I'll talk to you in person, not over the phone. If I've already been on a date with you I prob know you well enough to call, not text.

where every letter has a key, like a keyboard. No hitting 4 a whole bunch of times just to get the letter I

It's a normal keyboard. Look at the top-left six characters on your keyboard. Q-W-E-R-T-Y.

It's just enough contact to make them crave more.

Wow, I've heard about turning a woman into a lesbian, but apparently I've gone a step beyond and turned you into a teenage boy. 'cause you know there's a "clit" and it starts somewhere below the neck, but after that it's just a grope in the dark.

Since you don't text, you get a pass for not realizing this, but many (most? all?) regular keypad phones have an alternative texting mode called T9 or predictive texting instead of the multi-tap technique. You hit the appropriate key (e.g. "4" for the letter I) and your phone will guess which of the three or four possible letters that you really want to use. As you type a second and a third letter for your word, the "guess" for each of the letters gets better and by the time you're done typing the word the prediction is usually pretty accurate. In a word of reasonable length, like the word "length", the predictive capability is damned good. Over time, your usage patterns are taken into account and words that you use a lot will be more likely to be predicted. In shorter words like "on" or "no" which would share the same keystrokes, "66", you may have to select the less common choice after typing in the two keystrokes, but overall it's a very fast and efficient way to generate text messages.

Faster Texting with T9

I've tried that, but I've gotten so used to multi-tap, that it's faster for me that way.

patteeu's phone is a either a precursor to skynet or a cylon

Meow, dahling.

T9 and I don't get along.

I type everything all out. No slang. No shortcuts. But not cuz I'm not lazy, just cuz I think it makes people look like idiots.

The hair helps.

Once you get used to it, it's really a lot faster. If you can get used to multi-tap, you can get used to T9 and it won't be such a burden to carry on a texting conversation, although I do agree with you that at some point a phone call is so much simpler.