gdamn dude if that is you nice job.

unfortunatly 5 inches :(

Well no wonder.

as much as I tug on it you would think it would stretch

Demonpenz and Clayton looked juiced. Easy on the roids, fellas.

Mine has. Well, okay, it's curved off to the left by about 40 degrees.

hemorrhoids?

I think he's taking orange juice, though.

tap out acknowledged

concession accepted

Still hasn't gotten him laid though

:hmmm:

I'm tellin' ya, if you gave him some lessons in charm...

ROFL

...he'd still end up impregnating socks and tissues.

I'm sure with my help we could at least get him to impregnate some blowup latex

Only if we stretch the definition to include condoms or baloons.

I could plow any number of drunk bitches tonight.

I'm just selective.

And some things are worth waiting for.

lol at Luv. ROFL

Keep waiting man.

I'm getting laid this week.

She's on the back burner.

Orphan Annie has concrete and gravel marks on her knees.


You couldn't plow ass if it were tied over a barrel and covered with enough doughnut powder to draw you close enough to know it was there.


You won't get laid this week. You'll chicken out, you won't bring enough money...her dad will be home. Something, any excuse.


I do wish you'd get a vasectomy, just in case though.

Too many construction-site blowjobs.

a nice body only gets you so far. You have to act like fonzi if you want to get laid. Doesn't matter how fat you are as long as you are in that 200 pound range.

ROFL

Enough chicks seem to dig the virgin act.

Seriously.

They dig it more when you're good-looking, though. :D

act?

This

I vote for castration.......just to be sure.

What they dig more is a guy WILLING & ABLE to satisfy them..... :D

Yes, I suppose that's my next challenge. Repeat performances.

We'll find out soon enough.

Sucks for you.

Your opinion doesn't count. Only theirs.

So your preferred opinion is that of ugly chicks? Ok.

To each his own.

Ugly chicks need lovin' too. Unfortunately for them you've chickened out time after time.

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Unfortunately for them (and you) you wake up the next day and realize cinderella 12 beers was really the hideously ugly stepsister of a beluga.

Hey, hey!!!!!!

It wasn't my fault, they told me she was cute. :grr:

But she did have a great body. :shrug:

1. I don't consider them ugly, or I wouldn't be going after them.

2. I haven't chickened out. Not once.

Not going is preemptive chickening out.

When did I "not go."

Every day of your life so far.

I've never turned down an opportunity. Sorry. You're reaching. I'm not scared of girls.

You haven't turned down an opportunity because you haven't gotten yourself in place to turn down an opportunity. You're terrified of girls.

Sure I have.

Maybe unfortunate for some, but not for me (at least not yet).

This is old, but still love it.

Every dog has his day.

(I was using the general 'you', not you meaning DaKCMan AP.)

Figured as much, but still felt the need to clarify. ;)

Can we see some of the girls DaKCMan AP has been hanging out with?

You already have.

Refresh our memory then.

If you want a refresher you can go find them yourself.

OK. Where?

What don't you understand about "find them yourself"?

Why are you so unwilling to help me? I just want to bask in your man-god glory.

heh heh

A girl just asked me out

heh heh heh heh

(she has big boobs)

What happened to the Mexi-MILF? You try my idea?

mexi-milf is still around...she texted me the other night...gonna try and hit it tomorrow probably

Try not.

This story is never going to have an ending.

always with you it cannot be done!

Translation: No I haven't tried your idea because I like boys.

Dave Lane's idea was a little mean-spirited.

You're never having sex because you've gone from an obese, socially challenged introvert to pricky-skin suit who thinks that you're conad the barbarian over a couple of months.

You may have lost most of your pus gut, but the gravy has gone to your brain.

You're afraid of women who aren't nasty and nasty to women who aren't Hot enough" for a real prize catch like you.

You offer everything a hot chic desires.........or not.

"I'm TOO HAWT FOR YOU, FAT GIIIIIIIIIIIRL! SEE MY MUSCLES!!!"
http://outhouserag.typepad.com/photo...avid_smith.jpg

Anyone who tries to score chicks on the net like this should have scored by now it's not this difficult.

No, it's not.

Dude it shows MAJOR confidence and status. Its what will get you laid.

Time has proven that's not what he desires.

My darling sunshine... That line is always used on women. We hear the boasting of sexual prowess long before guys even know what the hell sexual prowess is.

Tell me you can bend your body in weird positions. Tell me you can't sleep on your stomach because your never ending boner pushes against your belly.

Don't tell me I'm about to miss a once in a lifetime opportunity. There's 10 more of you around the corner.

Back in the day, I used to use a line like

"hey I'm Iowanian, I'll guarantee 2 screaming orgasms tonight, and if you work as hard as I do, you can have one too"

sold.

Shit. I wasn't even using my deep, fonzy voice either.

I'll give that one a try. Not that I really need it.

You're going to get busted trying to use an Iowani-line. It won't work if you giggle or your voice cracks like Peter Brady.


I know the perfect line for meatpeeker.

"meet me at the Super 8 be'bey, I'll guarantee the most awkward 20 seconds of your life 4" can provide"

"oooh, sounds inviting. Its still going to cost you $150."

"If you think thats going to be weird, wait until I try out pillow talk for the first time."

I haven't tried "I'm a virgin", but "there was this one girl, I swear she came 50 times in a weekend" in the middle of a conversation has worked a few times.

Right, cause you score with such relative ease. :rolleyes:

Iowanian is awesome. There, I said it.

Great. There goes his ego again.

Someone has to be the yin to dakcman's yang