"Here is a knife and fork. Go play in the street."

ROFL

Do as your father says, you bastard!:cuss:

I saw a map once of the areas of the U.S. that called the drink all three of those. "Coke" is a southern Missouri thing. "Pop" is a northern thing, and "soda is a southern thing, generally speaking.

Shit fire, save matches!

I like that may use it
it will make them think

Rattle up a tin can
Daddy shot a bear
Shot him in the butthole
Didn't hit a hair.

I told that during 1st grade show and tell.

straighten up, and fly her right.

I was laughing my ass off when Pioli used this saying during a predraft interview.My dad and grandfather are only ones I knew that said this.

It sure does. I miss my son. :sulk:

My dad used to always tell me " Boy you'd fug up a crowbar in a sandbox"

Mom would say "Chit in one hand and wish in the other and tell me which one fills up first"

My father used to say that one, also. My uncles, too.

It's strange reading this thread. There are probably a dozen "sayings" I recall from my childhood. They must be Midwestern sayings, I guess.

See if you recognize this one ... whenever I was injured or hurt on the job, in an effort to motivate me, my Dad would say, "It's too far from your heart to kill you."

FAX

Grandpa: "Treat the Whores like Queens and the Queens like Whores!"

Believe half of what you see, and nothing of what you hear.

Whenever my Grandpa used to send me to the shed or garage for a tool or whatever, when I got back he'd say "If they're ever gonna hang me, I hope they send you for the rope".

It take's a big dog to weigh a ton.