I see three strikes in this relationship already...
Trust issues, lying and she hates your family.

You have your work cut out for you.

I think you messed up reading her text messages in the first place. That's real shady stuff and should honestly never happen. So no matter what you're going to lose here.

Yeah you have to hash this out now. What are the big 3 in divorce?

Money, Sex & In-laws? You already have a problem with one of those right now. Better get that out in the open now. It'll only come back to be an issue down the road if you don't.

I had an issue similar to me once happen years ago where my then girlfriend checked out an email I once had. She was in the wrong for doing so but I was also in the wrong for being the way I was. In the end, it was a painful process but we made it through and are happily married today. Looking back, I'm glad we got everything out in the open.

If she can act like that in front of your family, how will you know if anything is genuine between the two of you?

Oh, and privacy in a marriage, that's hilarious. Water is wet, women are nosy. My wife used to check my phone all of the time, I just gave her shit about it (in a fun way). When you have nothing to hide, it's not a big deal.

Be prepared for a huge fight, but would you rather have everything on the table before marriage or wait until it will be 100x worse?

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I would start your transformation at your folks place

"Bitch go make me a sandwich"

Seriously. They're engaged. You think she's never checked his shit out? Dollars to doughnuts...

No kidding.

It's human nature, though. Some people are worse than others.

i know someone already posted "pics or gtfo".

but seriously, does she have a great rack, and i mean a huuuuuuuge rack?

or does she have a fantastic turd-cutter? it's gotta be something fantastic, or you've basically done a lot of work for nothing. soooooo? pics or gtfo, already!!!!

Not to be mean or anything ... just overly rational ... but how do we know that his family isn't a freaking pack of ogres? They could eat out of troughs and fart at the dinner table. She's nice to their faces out of fear that they will kill her and make soup from her bones and the only people with whom she can confide are her own family? How do we know that isn't the case?

FAX

they might have big tittahs?

I don't know you personally so please don't take this personal. I have had a few dig into my privacy as well. ONLY my wife is allowed! But the bottom line....no matter who it is, if you are willing to go behind another's back to get info on them it's because you don't trust them or your trying to get the upper hand either way... Relationship FAIL!!

First...you ate the apple! and now that you see you have to make a choice. You invaded another's privacy ( things are private for a reason).

You're not married. What gives you the right? She is just like any other, weighing the pros and cons of the facts before marring into your family. Were her comments true? Or just snobby ( I am better than you ) lies?

So now the question is why did you go behind her back and read the text? And what are you going to do about this new info?

Second.....If you think what you done was ummm....WRONG maybe you could try this.

" Babe, how do you see my family? What do you think of them?" Get a fill for her honesty. Perhaps she would tell you.

Either way, trying to have a relationship while going behind someones back is just not good!

Give her a Houdini...

Then say " you deserved that "

Maybe she talks shit on your family to her family so her family doesn't feel so bad that you are not coming there but instead your going to your family.

Don't snoop if you don't want to know the truth.

Pro Tip. Women lie :)

I would recommend getting it on prior to bringing this up unless you think makeup sex is better

Good luck