Naw if I was a woman, I'd just stay home and play with myself :D


I know, how's that different from now? :doh!:

Not me. Heaven would be my dick being serviced while my mouth was on a teeet for eternity.
Posted via Mobile Device

That's a good reason to smoke.....



Smoke break ROFL

Different toys.

I can hardly believe it myself.

At some point I expect Morpheus to appear and say "You think that's pussy you're ****ing?"

http://www.the7thfire.com/images/morphs-pic.gif

Except for taking Bugeater to the 8/15 preseason game, I have no plans of dating right now. And Bugeater's a married man, so he doesn't really count anyway.

:D

If it happens, you gonna loan me a few? :evil:

Those aren't the tpes of toys I would share.

ROFL

I don’t know if you’re interested, but I thought I would hit you up cold. I am a (mostly) straight divorced guy, 40 years old, white, in shape, but I recently discovered I really like to suck cock. I am not looking to date a guy, or even talk, all I want is the chance to suck off a regular, straight guy.

I saw your profile, and thought I would take a chance that you might be interested. I want to do this with someone who does not know me. All I want you to do is let me suck you to completion, all you have to do is lay back and enjoy it. Let me know if you’re interested.

:shake:

Sucks for you. My gf is quickly becoming my best friend.

What "straight guy" would want or like another male to blow him?

Certainly not I.

It's pretty funny if you think about it: "Yeah, I want to blow a guy, but not if he's queer!"

how precious

LMAO

So how'd it go? Did he get you off?

You are just immature. I have/had plenty of female friends.

There is nothing mostly straight about a guy who wants to suck cock. Like Andrew Dice Clay stated more than 20 yrs ago: You either suck dick, or you do not suck dick.

My husband argues that this is an impossibility. That guys cannot be friends with females without at some point either f-ing them, thinking about f-ing them, or thinking about how you wouldn't f them even if they asked you, which then would make her not be able to be friends with the guy.

Do you have a 'Rabbit'? :D

That's only if they are moderately attractive.

I agree to a point. There were more than a few I wanted to bang, but I also knew things would get awkward if that ever happened.

Yup, when ugly girls want to be my friend I just tell them yes and never talk to them again. When they call I just play video games while they're talking.

I'm looking back on this and thinking my husband might have been right. The ones I was friends with turned out to be gay or posing as married menw ho were secretly gay.

How does this disqualify friendship?

Guys and girls can be friends...with benefits...

they are my husband's rules....

personally, I think they can be PLATONIC friends. But he thinks because of my excessive flirting that, with me, it is an impossibility.

Thinking about doing something and actually doing it are two different things. I have plenty of female friends.

I think it's mainly because he doesn't put that much stock in guys holding themselves back, perhaps. I don't know.

That would make it gay..

This is true, I have a couple of girl friends that I have thought about ****ing.. But, never will.. I think it just goes towards if you want to be seen in public with her..

I think it boils down to perception, you can have an ugly male friend and get away with it for all sorts of reasons.. But if you have an ugly girl friend?? **** no, you will get questioned nonstop..

Generally your girl friends are attractive enough for you to date but you do not.. Of course the loophole in this is, if you do have a not attractive girl friend you only go out in public with other friends as in a group..

I've fukt most of my female friends. Maybe I'm just friends with a lot of sluts :shrug:

even now that you have a girlfriend?

no.

past tense.

So did you have buttsecks saturday or what?

I have a couple redonkulus hot friends we don't like go to the movies all the time but we have some good times. I must be a weirdo because I am not attracted to them because they 1:) like shitty music 2:) are really hot like I like my strippers with some scars and shit because it is a girl I have a chance with 3:) when I roll around with my hot friends I get the wtf he must be gay (of course I am not I wear boating shoes with my chiefs jersey out)

Maybe your their version of their fat girl friend when they go out??

I can be friends with girls, but they can't be friends with me. They will eventually want to do me. I am an acquired taste. The more I'm around them the more they are attracted to me. Eventually I will be drunk and give in. I am not proud of this, but it is true. I only have one girl that I truly consider my friend, and we only made out and stuff a couple times so it's not awkward. :(

I have had plenty of guy friends.
I've only slept with 2 of them.

How do you remain friends with dudes you banged? I just can't see being close friends with girls that got gutted by me previously. Friendly acquaintances sure, but close friends no way.

Distance. :)

No. Guys and gals can be booty call buddies, but, by my definition of a friend, they are not friends.

No. I think I was being played.

This one looks like a lot of fun. We'll see.

http://i29.tinypic.com/2hqusf6.jpg

That's a lot of makeup.

Way out of your league. Stay in your weight class.

I'm guessing she's crazy. As in cookoo.

Please. The beautiful people flock to each other.

That's a lot of blech.

Dude, seriously. Stick with the 5s, you'll be a lot happier.

How would you know?

Neither of you are beautiful.

We're beautiful enough for each other. And that's all that matters.

Big talk. She'll ditch you just like the others did.

We're not having dinner. :evil:

Your zinger lost its' sting because of the grammar error.

Did you get nudes? She could be hiding a four incher in those pants.

ahahahahaahahahahah

50/50 chance that she is a dude. Did I say that correctly???:doh!:

OK, here's the story.

This girl wants to suck my dick. Lucky me. She's getting off work and heading to her tanning salon and wants to meet me there, and it's not far, so I head up there. She apparently was getting off at 5. I get there at 5:35 and stave off the advances of the gay clerk. Actually, we had a pretty nice conversation, I'm sure he wanted my number or something.

Anyway, 6:00 gets there and I begin to feel as if I've been stood up, played, been led on a wild goose chase, whatever. 6:20, I decide to leave. Damn.

About five minutes down the road I get a text that says "Hey! Im running a little late. U there yet?" WTF!!! Oh cruel fates. So we exchange a few more messages and plan to meet up tomorrow...although I'm not entirely sure I'm still not being played. However, she did say she talked to the clerk, who told her I had been waiting, and that he said I was "cute." Jeez, gay guys.

http://i32.tinypic.com/i6jm93.jpg

Okay, so it's actually the dude that wants to blow you. Just keep telling yourself "a mouth is a mouth".

LOL believe me when no one came in I started thinking the gay guy was playing me. But it's not him.

so, when do a bunch of coincidences become a pattern in your mind?

God lord goat boy. First your pitching wood, now muff diving.
You couldn't get this chick to look your way let alone blow you. When I see a pic of this chick slobering your knob i'll believe it, until then :BS:

I see. Hoes in different area codes. Not really friends.

I was in the middle of heavy traffic, had apparently just been stood up, and had no idea if I was being played or not. I didn't feel like turning around.

Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion.

If she doesn't show up tomorrow it will be obvious.

Oh yeah?

Of what you jerking off to some pic you nabbed off facebook?

I don't think with my dick often enough, apparently. I was definitely thinking with the other head at that point.

LOL

YOU might have turned around but I am not you.

The ability to delay gratification is the highest form of maturity.

I'm a more advanced form of life than you.

this is always at the top of my list of things I am thankful for.

how mature are you if you wait for the rest of eternity?

Ask a Priest. I think they get to play poker with God in the afterlife or something.

Allow me to retort....


http://www.onlineseats.com/upload/co...-Minnelli1.jpg

God dammit guys. There is nothing wrong with that chick's appearance.

http://i32.tinypic.com/35i5g11.jpg

I bet that bitches skin is like crocodile skin granny's from something about mary