I think there might be bears in my back yard.
 

Last night, my wife came to me and said that she's seeing "bear spots" in our yard. She took me outside and, lo and behold, there are several places in the yard where all the grass is gone, presumably the result of bears rolling around or something.

(By the way, I don't know much about bear behavior, but I did notice that they must seem to like the spots in our yard that get the most sun. So be careful if you're in a sunny area.)

Now I'm afraid to go outside. My wife says that she can call a company to take care of the bear spots, but that's not going to fix the core problem of bears rolling around outside just feet from my house. My wife thinks this isn't a big deal, but I'm worried. Any suggestions?

When they start doing the Superbowl Shuffle, call Civil Defense.

Just camp out tonight, and if one shows up, run up behind him scare him away with one of those really loud airhorns.

Who the heck do you think you are? Tony Soprano?

Bears get really bad around Denver this time of the year. They even saw one at Elitch Gardens once! They're coming out of hibernation hungry. I bet he's feasting in your garbage and then rolling around afterwards to aid digestion. Tell your wife you need to invest in some bear traps.

Where do you live?

Time to give Bwana a call.

reason with them....

30.06 to the head would do the trick.

Dunno. Looks like penguins have one approach to getting rid of annoying bears that are hanging around. Might wnat to give it a shot...

http://www.abhats.com/Penguin%20pola...%20symbols.jpg

ROFL

Didn't you recently have an issue with a female bare through the window across the street? I think you need to move, but that's just me.

Denver.

ROFL Rep comin your way.

I hear they don't like being poked with sharp sticks. you might try that.