Hear ye, hear ye! The monkey trial staffing and jury selection is now taking place!
 

The Judicial Team


Presiding Judge: Rain Man
Chief Legal Clerk: trndobrd
Assistant Legal Clerk: banyon
Chief Bailiff: frazod
Assistant Bailiff: slag02
Court reporter and commentator: Greg63
Court reporter and commentator: SPChief


Prosecution Team:

Donger - Lead Prosecutor
Hootie - Assistant Prosecutor
GoChiefs - Prosecuting Paralegal

Nominations for Defense Team:

JBucc (Self-Nominated)
Logical
Dale Mercer (Possible Self-Nominated)
SNR (Self-Nominated)
SCTrojan
JohnnyV13 (Self-Nominated)

In an interesting twist, defense lawyers are clamoring to take this high-profile case, while no one has yet volunteered to serve as prosecutor.


The Jury Pool consists of the following group, with 25 random jury notices to follow:

The jury pool consists of:

AriChiefs
JimNasium
NJChiefsFan
Adept Havelock
Chagrin
mmaddog
Delano
Fairplay
stcchief
bill parcells
sully
pastormikh
onthewarpath58
arrowheadwolf
bowser
noa949
carlos3652
scott free
Over-Head
Chieficus
Carlota69
Metrolike
Hog Farmer
AZChiefFan
Basilus777
Homey
Damark
KCChiefsfan88
(Zach)
Rukdafaidas
Jilly
Stevieray
Oxford
Manila-Chief
Lbedrock1
Sd4chiefs
fbal4lif32
BigRedChief
raiderhader
rad
unlurking
RedBull


(Banging gavel) Let the jury notices commence!

Jury Notice #1: Over-Head!

hook me up for something...I'VE GOT NOTHING BUT TIME, BABY!

Jury Notice #2: Chieficus!

Jury Notice #3: Carlota69!

Would you like to self-nominate for lead prosecutor?

(Banging gavel)

Jury Notice #4: Metrolike!

you can put me on the team, I don't know about lead though...that's some scary stuff.

Jury pool member reporting for duty/roll call your honor :drool:

Don't nominate me for anything please. Last time I was in something like this I fell 15,000 ft. out of a gun turret.

Jury Notice #5: Hog Farmer!

Jury Notice #6: AZChiefFan!

The defense team requests the cutoff for jurors be changed from 500 posts to 8 months of membership. Please?

Just FYI, if you get called for jury duty and don't show up, it's a Chiefsplanet felony.

Remember your honor, I haven't read any of the threads, so I am 100% impartial

Easy, Mr. Rain Man, your honor. That damnedable gavel noise is giving me a headache.

I would like to be in the gallery, if you please.

Free Mr. Mecca!!!! Free Mr. Mecca!!!!

FAX

Jury Notice #7: Arrowheadwolf! (Already volunteered)

With the exception being ''Icon'' status :D

The 500-post threshold is federal law. Both the prosecution and the defense will be allowed to reject potential jurors for any reason.

(Banging gavel.) Oh. Sorry, FAX.

do people really beg for reps on this site? Is that how it works? Is it like performing fellatio for cocaine? If so, I'm good at that.

I’m not, HANG’IM! :cuss:


Psst, who we talk’n ‘bout again? ;)

Jury Notice #8: Basilius777!

Jury Notice #9: homey!

Jury Notice #10: damark!

Jury Notice #11: KCChiefsfan88!

zzzzzzzzzzip

Jury Notice #12: (Zach)!

Jury Notice #13: Rukdafaidas!

Jury Notice #14: Jilly!

I watch a shit ton of law & order...maybe this is my calling in life.

Jury Notice #15: stevieray!

I want to be "randomly selected."

Do non US Citizens qualify for Jury duty... I think an outside illegal would help in this case :) :p ME!

Jury Notice #16: Oxford!

noa949......you were already randomly selected when your mom opted NOT to swallow.

WTF is going on here and why didn't I get the memo...

Jury Notice #17: Manila-Chief!

Jury Notice #18: Lbedrock1!

(with 503 posts...that's like drawing jury duty on your 18th birthday)

Jury Notice #19: sd4chiefs!

I'd be willing to serve. In what capacity, I leave in your hands, Rain Man.

Jury Notice #20: fbal4lif32!

Jury Notice #21: BigRedChief!

Prosecution team?

Jury Notice #22: raiderhader!

Your "randomness" is a little transparent.

Who is the defendant?

I want into the jury, i have absolutely no opinion on that SOB.

How so? What's he up to?

I guess you don't really want people that are impartial, do you

Jury Notice #23: rad!

Jury Notice #24: unlurking!

Senator's have no jurisdiction in this courtroom..Senator Dole :drool:

Last and final random notice...

Jury Notice #25: RedBull!

Whew!

Boo Hiss...

booo


hisss

actually, I have no idea what just happened

Where's the fun in that?

If you need a prosecuter, I nominate Donger...

See above. You are already in the jury pool. (Banging gavel.)

just having a little fun your honor

does that mean im not going to be a juror for this trial if i wasnt one of the 25 selected?

There will be a short recess while the judge has a work meeting.

Where is Frazod to keep order in the court...

Bailiff, shoot him!

Nope. Let's hit the bar.

You're still in the jury pool. By Chiefsplanet law, we must flesh it out with a random selection as well.

Looks like we will have to settle for randomly streaking thru the courtroom buck naked screaming LOOK AT ME!!! LOOK AT ME!!!

He is not here at the moment, please leave a message after the beep...


BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP...

Your honor, will counsel have an opportunity to voir dire?

mecca paid me money to "take care of the witnesses"




























OOPS SORRY

The bad news is that everything is in writing... you can off the witness, but you cant undo the writing... unless it was last year during the Sundays when CP was always down....

Mecca for now. But I think the investigation could become much larger over time.

Possibly. Let me assign my assistant legal clerk to research the issue.











Hey banyon, what's voir dire?

I bet Kevin's not wearing anything under that black robe.

Thats not really a reach considering he's wearing a powdered wig and robe designed after a Rogers & Hammerstein musical.

Can I make people cry?

this thread is worthess with pictures :shake: Please refrain//

Plus I think the media is not allowed...

I would like to apply for the position of court jester, or court minstrel, since I work in the entertainment industry. I will be on tour for the next seven days though. Hope the trial isn't over by then.

Basically, the prosecutors and defense attorneys would get a chance to question and strike three jurors each that they don't like and replace them with alternates.

Given the male to female ratio round here, Bob Dole doubts that a truly random sampling of 25 users with greater than 500 posts would yield as many tits as have been selected.

I object on the grounds that the jury pool has too many tits!!!

FAX