Own a laptop with wireless Internet?
 

I'd like to get someone to try an experimental poop thread. Some might call it "revolutionary". I'm thinking that rather than going and doing the deed, then coming back and describing it, we need to progress and change with the times.

So what I'm asking for is a play-by-play poop thread. Take the computer in with you and post your thoughts, feelings, smells, etc as the deed is being done.

As with all revolutionary change, this may not work out. As such please be aware that I am not responsible in any way, shape, or form for any distress or costs, real or emotional, that may arise from performing this act or any acts related to it.


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***** Q U A L I F I C A T I O N    R U L E S
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1. You must post before the first kid splashes down.

2. You must post between the first and last kid.

3. You must post between the last kid and wiping.

4. You must post between wiping and flushing.

5. You must summarize the experience post-flush.

I have a laptop with wireless. It's what I'm using now, and I have shit and posted before. Its fun.

Not pewping now so I cannot describe anything.

I'm posting... (plop)... still posting... (plop)

Sorry to inform you thats not very revolutionary, I was doing that 3 years ago.

You failed creative writing as a child, didn't you?

This concept alone makes me wish that I did indeed own a lap top with wireless internet.

Prove it.

Dammit. I just shit 20 minutes ago.

You got it, I've been in the crapper many times, but next time I will give you the description

I was going last night before I signed off, from like 11pm to 1130

You took a half hour s**t? You might want to have that looked at. But not by Goatcheeze, that would just be weird.

My digestive track is still processing supper, but it matters very little since I don't have wireless internet.

OMG :shake:

I had 3 heaping bowls of a tasty, as-of-yet-unnamed casserole my wife prepared for dinner.

It had taters, onions, hamburger, and no shortage of cheese. I have a feeling you can count on my participation priot to bedtime this evening.

Kick ass.

I have laptop that has wirless built in but I do not have a wireless internet connection. I do however have a 50 foot ethernet cable

That works.

Judges?

The exact arrangement of your connectivity is irrelevant. I appreciate any participation in this study.

Shut up N00B!!!

If you didnt have any connection from inside the bathroom, could you write down notes on a pad of paper, and then come back to your computer and copy them down into this thread?

Note:

As long as the cable is only used to connect your PC to the Internet and makes no pit-stops in between. Otherwise you'll have to take a black and white photo and call it "art". You could even get a government grant.

Yeah, I have a prostrate the size of a watermelon. It’s probably about to rupture, but I’ll be sure to mention that too.

Only if you dictate the notes to someone else. We don't want anyone stabbing or poking something by accident.

Just make sure you click "Submit Reply" before you go towards the white light.

Does the other person have to corroborate the incident? Or can I just say that there was another person?

...I a wait with anticipation.

We'll take your word for it, but as a Charger's fan it's already obvious you have no friends or family.

Skip is that you???























I can't believe I just insulted skip.....sorry buddy it was unintentional.

I have pictures, but I doubt that would help out my rep.

what makes you think I'm going to any white or lightened place?

Ok, I've amended the thread header to include the rules for qualification into the study.

What if there is only one "kid"?

Please post a pic. You'd be the pope in no time, I'm sure.

Then you don't qualify, Sally.

Then you only have one "kid"; geez woman???

The names Alice. And I've had many a poop that have been one piece and over a foot long.

Careful there, Tripod.





:D

LMAO




Oh, alright.

Eating at Sonic again eh?

ever had a no - wiper?

I knew charger fans were gay!

YES!!! Those are the best, I always feel like I've completed a great accomplishment when I have one of those.

Yup; mighty convenient!

C'mon man, you know you like it when you stand up and look in the toilet and a beast is looking back at you.

I usually have a wipe forever poop though; hate those.

The worst is when they're standing up in the hole and they're above water.

:shudder:

well, with my afore mentioned prostrate problems joined with some nasty IBS, all I have looking back at me after several minutes of labor, is a bowl of dark grape koolaide

If you had your own theme music, what music would be playing while you pooped?

I'm thinking mine might be We Are the Champions by Queen

Grape GATORADE. GATORADE.

Damnit n00bs, LEARN YOUR LEXICON! Otherwise I'm going to stab you in the face.

I had some chinese, but likely won't crap til mornin.

Flight of the bumble bee - by Rimsky

Oh, sorry. I wasn't trying to reference anything, I was just making shit up......


Punny

Dont count on it, Chinese food is the enemy of poop.

You think that now, but I actually tried to crap in a public s**tter to that song and it's just not possible. I had to wait for the song to be over so I could do my thing.

See, it doesn't matter if the two things actually tie together or not, you make it happen by using the Lexicon.

For instance, if anyone ever says "cat", it's obligatory that someone else mention "a bowl of antifreeze" within 5 posts or someone else must mention "this place has lost it's burst".

lately I've been feeling the urge to purge when I hear the chief's fight song.

Ahhh, ok,




is there a list somewhere

I could show it to you but then I'd have to kill you.

Truth be told it's how we know who is and is not a n00b.

Just pay attention and when you see something you don't understand ask. Remember, there are no stupid questions. Just stupid n00bs who ask them.

shank you

I've been here so much, you'd think I would have picked up on more by now.

So before the combo was Grape and Gatoraide?

You mean you won't open your mouth until then???

If something is going to be either "grape" or "gatorade", you should mix the two. It's a false reference to a drink luv was said to be fond of during the Great Mooo Affair of '06.

Well, thanks for saving me back there, I certainly do not want this thread to lose it's burst.

Well played. :clap:


Now don't make me stab you in the face.

After some spicey cajun wings and greasy buttery popcorn, choked down with rolling rock I could feel a rumble in my tummy.

yup it's a rumble, my next post on this thread will be post-turdulance

WAIT, TAKE A LAPTOP WITH YOU!!!

What the hell is going on here?


PBJ FirstDownSamie PBJ

UNLESS, the cat is eating nachos, then it may stand on it's own.

Jeezus Christ! WHO LEFT THE F**KING SCREEN DOOR OPEN AND LET ALL THE n00bs IN?!?!?

Get this guy some damn Antifreeze. Look at his avatar. Damn You.

Hey, do you remember the origin of "stab them in the face"?

Of course I do, do you think I've lost my burst??

I crawled in the open bedroom window. Your mom is a real nice lady...er woman


PBJ FirstDownSamie PBJ

So tell ME.

You let her do you in the butt, didn't you?