Beer Heaven
 

That Miller Lite commercial is lame. I can only imagine men everywhere are saying to themselves, “That’s not even close to my idea of Beer Heaven!” So, what is your idea of Beer Heaven?

Mine:

An enormous low-lit tavern with high ceilings and private booths nestled on the beach with a patio deck. There is always a star-filled night sky with a full moon and shooting stars. The weather is always perfect and the sand feels like crystals between your toes.

The bar will have the following:
- State-of-the art TVs showing every football game and sporting event to my liking.
- A roomy poolroom with solid oak pool tables and cues that never break.
- A jukebox loaded with all of my favorite music.
- High back stools with leather seats.
- Fresh seafood and KC style BBQ
- A live stage hosting my favorite bands. Remember, this is Heaven, so one night it may be Jimi Hendrix, another night it may be The Doors, and other night, it may be the Beatles or Pink Floyd- you get the idea. It’s Beer Heaven dammit.

Beer, of course, would be free, and it wouldn’t be that Miller Lite crap- it would be some of the richest brews brewed up by a world renowned brew master.

The only men allowed are my closest buddies. And, of course, the tavern is filled with some of the most beautiful and engaging women in the world.

There’s a private bathroom, a private hot-tub, and a private bedroom. Hey, it’s beer heaven! I’d never leave!

And lastly, there’s no such thing as a hang-over in Beer Heaven. Drink up!

I don't know. Everything seems acceptable in the commercial except that they presume Miller Light - or, rather, any Miller product - would be the beer featured in beer heaven. No chance in hell.

Beer heaven?

My own personal iced down keg(brand is irrelevant) and a catheter.
sec

Beer Heaven? A liver that never fails... A gut that doesn't form...

any place with lots of hot chicks to look at is pretty good

I'll 2nd that. and ample quality cigars for the women to light.

Put that crap on her back. All those taps and kegs are blocking access to her "goodies".

That would make keg stands real fun :thumb:

japanese "5 minute room", with beer

OK, but then what would you do with the remaining four and a half minutes?

I beg to differ on the whole Miller Lite issue.

Damn fine product.

Suicide bomber?

I like her. She seems like the type of girl who makes certain your beer comes with some head.

FAX

LMAO

Beer and a sweet bike to pull all the hot chicks I want.

whatever, great taste less filling, world beer cup, along with being an all natural pilsner, you can't go wrong.


Posted via Mobile Device

I've been to Beer Heaven. It's located in Munich, Germany.

I assume that's why I've seen more than one pick on this very board of you drinking it.........

Wow!! The Velvet Mirkin is a beer AND a deviant sexual act.

I didn't know that.

FAX

I think I'm going to call my next band The Velvet Merkins.

FAX

The next thing you know, Velvet Jones is going to want a beer named after him, too.

FAX

It's cold outside, honey ... be sure and wear your Velvet Mirkins.

FAX

When you turn a reversible Velvet Mirkin inside out, you have a Velvet Nikrim.

FAX

This Mirkin feels like sandpaper!! Somebody bring me a Velvet Mirkin!!

FAX

For God's sake, be careful and don't spill that Coke on the sofa!!! That's brand new Velvet Mirkin!!

FAX

Her panties were too tight and kept pinching her Velvet Mirkin.

FAX

Have I mentioned that I really fucking hate beer snobs?

Yeeaaah. Um...I'm going to have to go with the big angry Hitler NEIN on the catheter.

When I hear "Yes Mr. Rausch, we're going to jab this tube up yer' penis so's you don't have to get up to use the re-" I don't think it's miller time.

I think I'd have to toss my unopened can of brew betwix their eyes with as much velocity as I can muster before I GTFO...:spock:

Jagermeistermuffinbomber...:drool:

Mr. ENDelt260 isn't a snob, Mr. tomahawk kid. He's more like an educator, a teacher, a purveyor and promulgator of valuable information about life, love, and liquor. And, he's right about Velvet Mirkin. Here's their slogan ...

When you're lonely and feel like jerkin'
Have yourself a Velvet Mirkin
Goes down smooth and goes down easy
Doesn't make you sick or queasy

And, when babes see what you're drinkin'
They'll be showin' you the pink 'n
Pretty soon your face is smirkin'
When you're slurpin' Velvet Mirkin

FAX

A beer snob for pointing out that Miller sucks?

A beer snob is someone who touts a very obscure beer and words it to sound sophisticated.

Telling someone Miller sucks doesn't make someone a beer snob.

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck........

What's you ale of choice?

Damnit... I thought this was about Beaver Heaven.

Miller Lite is ok....but better choices are available to those with discriminating taste / palette...

the cost difference is really low.

but hey, same can be said for the BL crowd here, daddy/my uncle etc work at AB....so im must drink BL /Bud no matter what.

Light Beer: Rolling Rock (I expect some disagreements on that one)
Heavy Beer: Sixth Glass from Boulevard, but I'm really still trying a lot of stuff so it changes often.

I can tell you I hate IPAs.

Nipsey Russell lives on!

Boulevard Unfiltered is actually what I drink the most next to Miller Lite.

I find it amusing that you agree with the notion "Miller sucks" but you're favorite light beer is Rolling Rock.

That's awesome.

I have a simliar loyalty situation with Miller Lite.

Yes, but I clarify it as a light beer. If your favorite all time beer is Miller Light, I'm afraid you either a) don't like beer and drink only to get wasted or b) haven't tried much.

Allow me to expand my thoughts:

Miller Lite is my stand by beer. I've drank it for many years now and I truly think it's the best tasting light beer on the market. It's great to drink when it's hot outside or after cutting the lawn or if you're planning on drinking beer all day (i.e. get plastered) .

The beer that probably tastes the best to me overall is Boulevard Unfiltered Wheat. If I go to a bar and order a draft beer, it's usually BUW. However, it's a bit on the heavier side and it's hard to drink alot of it.

I don't know which description would qualify the beer as my "favorite", but I still take issue with the notion that "Miller sucks".

I tend to roll a little les...expensive.

I hear ya.

I drank alot of Beast Light in college / early adulthood.

Beer Heaven ids the Great American Beer festival.

2800 beers, and I'm gonna try all of them.



http://www.beertown.org/events/GABF/

...well 10% would be a pretty good goal.

* insert rant about how I'm too good to drink macro-brew swill and my stomach and vagina are much too sensitive to handle the noxious poison that is Miller Lite *