OFFICIAL Rangers vs Royals weekend series thread
 

Let's get it ON motherhumpers! Tonight your asses are MINE!

Feldman (8-3 3.87) vs Greinke (10-5 2.08)

You may get our asses the next two games, but Greinke is likely to hand you your own.

NO! We OWN the Royals.

Greinke's fastballs are getting ****ed to St. Louis tonight. Ian Kinsler, Nelson Cruz, Hank Blalock....BRING IT ON!!!

Um really? I was at the Rangers/Royals series in Arlington. We were kicking ass then. I am looking for the same tonight with Grienke.

Greinke threw a CG shutout against the Rangers earlier this season.

Besides, balls hit out of Kauffman Stadium wouldn't go towards STL were they extended a long ways, they'd go towards Northwestern MO and the south of Nebraska.

We will hit the balls so hard they will go around the earth.

Kinsler looked like a chump bitch on that at-bat. Nay, he looked like a Royal.

this will be the first broadcast from The K I've seen this season

Greinke walks Michael Young.

FIRST-INNING MELTDOWN?

That's already one more walk than he gave up back in April to the Rangers. Nooooooo!

SIT DOWN

Holy balls. That pitch was like ipecac syrup -- it was vomit inducing. SICK

Son of a bitch!

SAFE YOU ****S

Oh look, Alex is back

We can't defend anyone but Greinke.

Greinke threw 20 pitches. HE WON'T LAST LONG AT THIS RATE!

when did Gordon return?

He couldn't locate his slider early on, but he found it. His fastball has a lot of life tonight. It wouldn't surprise me to see him work some quick innings coming up.

after the All Star break

Leadoff walk. Bout time.

Good AB for DDJ.

DDJ giveth. DDJ taketh away.

Rangers reporting that pitcher Vincente Padilla has tested positive for Swine Flu

Or, perhaps. DDJ giveth. Tardman taketh away.

That looked easy. You guys suck.

Yes, we do.

We are aware. Now shut it.

Zackkkk, or Zack kkkk, whichever you prefer.

Son of a bitch that was quick.

that's more like it. 12 pitches that inning.

OH SNAP

Pitching duel!

Until the game reaches the Royals bullpen, that is.

LOL keystone cops

wakka wakka wakka

Oh god, a really fat girl just waved at the camera.

The Royals should play the Rangers every night.

Clayton has made a Royals thread readable.

There's a Nick joke in there somewhere.

jeezus...how often do we have to inflate this guy's virtual ego?

SIT DOWN!

Son of a bitch, another K.

oh snap

eat it

1-0 rangers

That'll happen sometimes. Nice blast.

Teahen's weak arm was no match for Cruz's speed! BOOYAH!

hEY Teagarden, where's your trombone?

Royals need to respond here with some ruPshhssahahahahaahaha

Sorry, I couldn't say that with a straight face.

Taylor Teagarden is a waste of space. God.

we can't all have a 14 letter last name

How slow is that runner for Feldman to do that? Jesus H. Christ.

Haha. FAIL!

Callapso

Kinsler is feeling those

Greinke's control is faltering.

DOOMED

Or you can just throw it down the middle of the plate as fast as possible. Goddamn.

Micheal Young needs to be a kansas City Royal

Zack has ti wear a size 8 hat

Why is that umpire spazzing?

He's trying to keep the game interesting.

Hamiltons streak of being Zack's bitch continues

86 pitches for Greinke.

IT WON'T LAST ROYALS FANS!!!

C'mon!!! The Royals cannot possibly be this bad. They're getting shutout by Scott Feldman?!?!

Score just a few runs here and there.

P.S. Matt Holliday is 2/3 with an RBI, a R and a SB.

We have had no problem scoring this past week. Why now?

Because we're a terrible team.

We just swept the Red Sox. The Royals are a flea on our Texas behind right now.

But Hootie said he's just average.

Yuniesky's plate discipline is a sight to behold.

This won't be the first 1-0 game that Zack will lose.

LMAO We could really use Jose Guillen's big bat!

Well, shit. Greinke can just strike out the whole lineup I guess if he needs to keep his pitch count down.

That double won't mean shit after a couple of weakly tapped ground balls.

Way to go out on a limb there.

Another double.

If only he could hit away from Coors.

LMAO

I think you guys are in the wrong thread.

This game sucks. I'm gonna' go drizzle balsamic vinegar on something and eat it.

Haha. I laugh at the hope the wild pitch gives Royals fans right before the weak fly out.

INNING OVAH!

:harumph:

That was a ****ing HR before the Royals moved the fences back. Damn.

OK, that better be the end of Greinke. Tired of this shit.

Hate to see this Royals team leaving Zack twisting in the wind. Fukc them in their non-hitting assholes.

Okay gentlemen, you cannot be this MFing bad.

I know I said this 2 days ago, but I refuse to believe that this is a historically shitty club.

Get me a MFing win!! And a save!! Or at least get my freakin' stud off the hook for the loss. You're embarassing my hometown here guys, people are going to start busting out the petitions to let the Royals play with steroids again. Don't you remember how badly that !@#$ sucked?

This is epic amounts of suck.