ChiefsPlanet - Life I cannot believe I just lost my dog.

It makes absolutely no sense.

She was perfectly fine two days ago. As she's always been.

Greeted me at the door, tugged on her rope, leashed her up and took her on a huge walk at a local park.

Read some, her curled up at my feet. Watched some TV. Just like any other Wednesday.

She sits perched at my window, watching (and barking at) people that go by. I have an ottoman that I put a blanket on specifically for her, so she can sit there and put her head down, and look out the window.

She was only a Shetland Sheepdog (a "sheltie"), but she was incredibly athletic. Just this past weekend I took her to Busiek here in the Ozarks and she was on my heel the entire time.

In the past 6.5 years I've known her, I've taken her canoing, I've taken her to class, I've taken her pretty much everywhere. If you know me and my family, you almost certainly knew Gracie.

We had our entire line of communication streamlined. We knew each other's moves like figure skaters. With just a whistle, snap of the finger, or monosyllabic command, I could tell her exactly what to do and when. She was so low-maintenance and so well trained it wasn't even funny.

I never worried about her with other dogs, or children (she hated babies, who yanked her fur). I took her to Thanksgiving dinner with an extended family of about 15 people, four of them kids, in a small, crowded house. I'd lose her for a few hours in the crowd, but she'd emerge always towards the end of the night when it was time to go home and feed her.

Yesterday, we wake up and she's walking around, but won't eat, won't drink, won't jump or bark or interact other than sleeping at my feet.

I figure she just ate some bad shit, and it's working its way through her system. S'had happened before.

By the time 8pm rolled along, she was limp. Wasn't hardly moving at all. We take her to the vet, totally perplexed -- WTF. She was fine ONE DAY AGO. What is upsetting her?

A goddamn tumor in her liver, that's what. At least so they think. Something's ruptured. Her stomach is packed full of blood.

I can shell out $2,000 for "exploratory surgery" -- literally where they open her up and simply try to figure out WTF it is and how removeable it might be. But I've had many dogs before. The cancer will always come back.

We had no idea. She never gave any hints. Then yesterday, she flatlines.

And we put her down.

I still have all her shit. I just bought this big bag of dog food. Basket of toys. Her ottoman sits by the window, totally vacated. Seems totally pointless to have all this shit around now. What am I going to do now, go for walks? Go to the park? What the **** for? She was my inspiration and my motivation. Now she's gone.

She was 6. Only 6. She was supposed to give me a whole 'nother lifetime.

And in one day, that was ripped away from her.

I cannot even process how I feel.

She was only six.

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