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-   -   Misc Ikea coming to Kansas City. (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=264301)

Al Bundy 09-26-2012 11:15 PM

Ikea coming to Kansas City.
 
http://fox4kc.com/2012/09/26/ikea-to...n-kansas-city/


MERRIAM, Kan. — Swedish furniture store IKEA will announce plans Thursday to open a store in the Kansas City area.

The store will be built in Merriam, at the southeast corner of I-35 and Johnson Drive, at a currently vacant shopping center.

Official plans will be announced at a briefing Thursday morning. Fox 4 will have coverage during the day on Fox 4 News and at Fox4KC.com.

DaneMcCloud 09-26-2012 11:17 PM

Ikea ****ing rules! Congrats!

Al Bundy 09-26-2012 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 8953558)
Ikea ****ing rules! Congrats!

Seems like the women I know love it, I've never been there myself. Is it like a Pottery Barn, Crate & Barrel type of place?

TinyEvel 09-26-2012 11:20 PM

Hopefully you're familiar with IKEA, the cavernous
Swedish furniture store??
While spending the better part of two hours in there
the other day I noticed that a lot of the Swedish
names for their furniture and stuff would make great
nicknames for your unit. Stuff like the Schlong lamp,
Shmedvik chair, etc.?
I mean, names like Peter, Mr. Happy, One-Eyed Willy,
the little Spelunker, etc. get old after a while, right??
So I jumped on-line for a look at their catalog, and wouldn't you know it's a virtual treasure trove of great nicknames for your Johnson.?
Here are just a few REAL names from the IKEA catalog
note: typing restrictions kept me from using the little two-dots, flying "v"s and other additional Swedish accent marks, but you'll get the idea. Happy shopping...

NAME (what it is) When the name applies

AGEN (chair) name it this if you’re on the Viagra
AKTION (spice mill) name it this if you get girls by saying you’re a director.
ALVINE (curtain) name it this, and you can call your balls “the chipmunks”
ANTONIUS (storage) macho as hell Roman name
BAGN (bed tray) if you always use a condom
BAREN (cabinet) if you shave it
BJARNUM JARPEN (shelf) if you want to give it a Star Wars-ish name
BLANKEN (soap dish) if you’ve had a vasectomy
BOLSNAS (basket) named after the other stuff down there.
BONA (vase) good name if it’s always stiff
BUMERANG (hanger) if it’s bent
BYGGA (construction set) if you’ve had it enlarged
DRAG (handle) if your penis will be a “surprise” to someone.
DRAGON (fork) Actually Short for “Peter B. Dragon”
bundle of sticksELBO (sofa) If you’re ghey, and it’s bent
FLYGEL (lamp) if it shoots far
FUNKIS (magazine rack) if it smells
FORMA (bowl) if you can bend it into shapes
GRIP (handle) if you’ve always got your hand on it
HOPEN (table) if you keep a condom in your wallet
INNER (cushion) where it wishes it can be
JERKER ( drawer) see GRIP
JABBA (hanger) If you like Star Wars names, though not recommended
KNUFF (file cabinet) if it’s just over five inches
MANE (chair) if it’s hairy
POKAL (glass) if you’d do anyone
PROMPT (muffin tin) if it comes on time
PLUGG (clock) what better name for something designed to fill a hole?
RAMBERG (wardrobe) Good name for it if you’re German
RIBBA (frame) if it will reach all the way up to her lungs
SCHLAGER (lamp) Perfect Swedish name for your wood. Say it out loud. See?
SIGFRID (bracket) great name if you have just one testicle, named Roy.
STORM (lamp) if it comes unexpectedly
SULTAN (bed) if you keep a turban on it
UTANG (lamp) with this name, you can use an awesome slogan “Utang wants some p**ntang”
VORK (rug) sounds like a Swedish Superhero. Plus, you can say, “Vork wants to pork”
WILMA (curtain) only a good name when coupled with the surname Cockfit

Ace Gunner 09-26-2012 11:20 PM

Was just in that one in Burbank. Good to see they are headed to KC. I need furniture out there.

Phobia 09-26-2012 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Al Bundy (Post 8953561)
Seems like the women I know love it, I've never been there myself. Is it like a Pottery Barn, Crate & Barrel type of place?

No, it's like the WalMart of furniture plus home accessories. Be careful what you buy. Some is complete crap but they have a lot of really nice, practical things for a house. Every metro area should have one.

Ace Gunner 09-26-2012 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Al Bundy (Post 8953561)
Seems like the women I know love it, I've never been there myself. Is it like a Pottery Barn, Crate & Barrel type of place?

It's a full service home furnishings store. Bed sheets to pot/pans to furniture etc. Not a chine importer.

Ming the Merciless 09-26-2012 11:24 PM

two words:

swedish meatballs

DaneMcCloud 09-26-2012 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Al Bundy (Post 8953561)
Seems like the women I know love it, I've never been there myself. Is it like a Pottery Barn, Crate & Barrel type of place?

No, not at all.

First off, it's extremely inexpensive but well made. Most of the designs are mdf with a veneer but extremely stylish and Euro. Very sleek, very cool.

The biggest "drag" about Ikea is that you have to build it yourself. Everything is super heavy, so carrying it up stairs is a bitch. Also, they provide "Picture" diagrams instead of "instructions", so once you've successfully assembled an item, you know how to assemble it in the future.

But that's not all: They have super cheap but well made accessories for bathrooms, kitchens, rugs, dishes - basically everything you would need for your home or apartment. And the designs are so cool that even though you're not spending a lot of money, it looks GREAT.

I have so many Ikea items in my house that I couldn't even begin to count, from bedframes, dressers, chests, etc. and they look great and perform well.

And their kitchen cabinets and designs are top notch and far less than what you'd get at Home Depot or Lowe's.

Bump 09-26-2012 11:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia (Post 8953564)
No, it's like the WalMart of furniture plus home accessories. Be careful what you buy. Some is complete crap but they have a lot of really nice, practical things for a house. Every metro area should have one.

it's better than WalMart quality. It's made in Sweden for Christ sakes! lol

DaneMcCloud 09-26-2012 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia (Post 8953564)
No, it's like the WalMart of furniture plus home accessories. Be careful what you buy. Some is complete crap but they have a lot of really nice, practical things for a house. Every metro area should have one.

If you haven't been to an Ikea in the past few years, I think you'd be surprised at the upgrade in quality. I remember back in the mid-90's, it was cheap and looked cheap. Now, it's still inexpensive but the quality is so much better and better looking, too.

I wouldn't be surprised if you install a few Ikea kitchens in the near the future.

Phobia 09-26-2012 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bump (Post 8953570)
it's better than WalMart quality. It's made in Sweden for Christ sakes! lol

Despite my immediate segue to quality, I didn't invoke the walmart name as an indictment on their quality - just that it is vast and you'll find every imaginable home accessory there - even kitchen cabinets.

Phobia 09-26-2012 11:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 8953573)
If you haven't been to an Ikea in the past few years, I think you'd be surprised at the upgrade in quality. I remember back in the mid-90's, it was cheap and looked cheap. Now, it's still inexpensive but the quality is so much better and better looking, too.

I wouldn't be surprised if you install a few Ikea kitchens in the near the future.

No, I agree even though it has been a while. Ikea was a semi-monthly trip for us when we lived in Houston and I'm sure we still have plenty of Ikea items in our home. I even enjoy their lighting selections. I'm excited about the news. I'm pretty sure I heard rumblings about this last fall.

Al Bundy 09-26-2012 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 8953569)
No, not at all.

First off, it's extremely inexpensive but well made. Most of the designs are mdf with a veneer but extremely stylish and Euro. Very sleek, very cool.

The biggest "drag" about Ikea is that you have to build it yourself. Everything is super heavy, so carrying it up stairs is a bitch. Also, they provide "Picture" diagrams instead of "instructions", so once you've successfully assembled an item, you know how to assemble it in the future.

But that's not all: They have super cheap but well made accessories for bathrooms, kitchens, rugs, dishes - basically everything you would need for your home or apartment. And the designs are so cool that even though you're not spending a lot of money, it looks GREAT.

I have so many Ikea items in my house that I couldn't even begin to count, from bedframes, dressers, chests, etc. and they look great and perform well.

And their kitchen cabinets and designs are top notch and far less than what you'd get at Home Depot or Lowe's.

I gotcha... I used to work at a C&B a few years ago.. so I know about assembling stuff. It really is not that hard to assemble any of it if you pay attention... pluse one thing that could help people is taking it out of the box piece by piece.

Bump 09-26-2012 11:35 PM

Nebraska Furniture Mart must be going nuts right now. some competition for those bastards.


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