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-   -   Movies and TV MACHETE! (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=232776)

The Elder 09-03-2010 02:58 PM

Time to talk about this movie. If you dont wanna know anything about it then stop reading now.


Okay. What we have here is a man (Danny Trejo) that in real life is a bad ass. A tough kid that grew up to be the prison boxing champ and was given a break. We have seen him 100's of times and you really dont know his name. But he is that BAD ASS mexican dude with alot of Ink on his body. And he is one ugly M***er F***er. The man finally has a leading role and takes full advantage of it. He is set up to be the fall guy and he is not too happy about it. Its like they crossed The Expendables and Piranna 3D into one movie. Full of action and blood and some really campy moments. It actually our Grindhouse's Grindouse. lol. This is the movie they should have made instead.

Very 70's with a modern twist. And the absolutly hottest woman on the planet, Michelle Rodriguez goes beyond anything she has ever done. Her part alone allows me to forgive them for having Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Alba in this film. Neither of which can act. Alba should stick to calenders and Lohan should just go away. However. Jesssica Alba naked in the shower does have its perks. Machete gets nail her (what a lucky ugly man). COme to think of it. Linsay Lohan and her mom (in the movie) are both naked in the pool anf Machete gets the two of them at the same time (what a really lucky ugly man). And then there is Michelle Rodriguez and the SOB gets to bump his ugly with her too. (Pity she didnt get naked) but what a really really lucky man.

Cheech Marin, who plays Machete's brother is now a priest and has one of the best lines in the movie, I reslove you of all your sins now get the f**k out of here." LOL.
Robert De Niro is awesome as a racsist political asshole and you can tell he is having fun in the movie. He really gets to cut loose. Also Steven Seagal is our favorit drug dealer that is in control of everything and has a really vicious side. And he finally lost the ponytail.

The movie deals with some strong political opinions and will offend some. But most should accept the movie for what it is. A kickass good time

DaneMcCloud 09-03-2010 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Detoxing (Post 6974784)
What's your opinion on Rob Zombie as a Director?

I liked the Were Women short but other than that, I haven't watched his films.

I'm not a horror fan, at all.

Sweet Daddy Hate 09-03-2010 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Elder (Post 6975006)
Time to talk about this movie. If you dont wanna know anything about it then stop reading now.


Okay. What we have here is a man (Danny Trejo) that in real life is a bad ass. A tough kid that grew up to be the prison boxing champ and was given a break. We have seen him 100's of times and you really dont know his name. But he is that BAD ASS mexican dude with alot of Ink on his body. And he is one ugly M***er F***er. The man finally has a leading role and takes full advantage of it. He is set up to be the fall guy and he is not too happy about it. Its like they crossed The Expendables and Piranna 3D into one movie. Full of action and blood and some really campy moments. It actually our Grindhouse's Grindouse. lol. This is the movie they should have made instead.

Very 70's with a modern twist. And the absolutly hottest woman on the planet, Michelle Rodriguez goes beyond anything she has ever done. Her part alone allows me to forgive them for having Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Alba in this film. Neither of which can act. Alba should stick to calenders and Lohan should just go away. However. Jesssica Alba naked in the shower does have its perks. Machete gets nail her (what a lucky ugly man). COme to think of it. Linsay Lohan and her mom (in the movie) are both naked in the pool anf Machete gets the two of them at the same time (what a really lucky ugly man). And then there is Michelle Rodriguez and the SOB gets to bump his ugly with her too. (Pity she didnt get naked) but what a really really lucky man.

Cheech Marin, who plays Machete's brother is now a priest and has one of the best lines in the movie, I reslove you of all your sins now get the f**k out of here." LOL.
Robert De Niro is awesome as a racsist political asshole and you can tell he is having fun in the movie. He really gets to cut loose. Also Steven Seagal is our favorit drug dealer that is in control of everything and has a really vicious side. And he finally lost the ponytail.

The movie deals with some strong political opinions and will offend some. But most should accept the movie for what it is. A kickass good time

That settles it; I'm going to the theater.

JD10367 09-03-2010 05:04 PM

Just saw "Machete". It made "The Expendables" look like a Disney cartoon, LOL. And Michelle Rodriguez looks KICKIN' hot. She's thinner than she's ever been. The funbags are gone, but so is the booty and the stomach roll. She looks 10 years younger. Jessica Alba, of course, is hot (and there's a full-body nude side shot). Lindsey Lohan is bare ass and, while she's a whacked out chick, the body's good. Cheech, Don Johnson, and DeNiro are all awesome... as is, of course, Machete himself. The film is beyond over-the-top.

Valiant 09-03-2010 06:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ROR (Post 6968555)
This. It looked more interesting than "Grindhouse". Wasn't it called "The Mexican" back then?

Yeah,probably did not want that title out with all the beheadings on the border..

Sweet Daddy Hate 09-03-2010 07:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valiant (Post 6975398)
Yeah,probably did not want that title out with all the beheadings on the border..

LMAO

OnTheWarpath15 09-03-2010 07:52 PM

It's been widely reported that Lohan had a body double for Machete.

Sorry to disappoint.

JD10367 09-03-2010 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnTheWarpath58 (Post 6975536)
It's been widely reported that Lohan had a body double for Machete.

Sorry to disappoint.

Well, considering they had shots of Lohan facing the camera with no shirt on, that'd be a neat trick.

Deberg_1990 09-03-2010 09:47 PM

OK, so now we have the Grindhouse knockoff "fake" trailers being made into full length feature films.....

Hobo With a Shotgun trailer... ROFL


<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9nbl78cj5vM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xd0d0d0&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9nbl78cj5vM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xd0d0d0&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

Sweet Daddy Hate 09-03-2010 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deberg_1990 (Post 6975823)
OK, so now we have the Grindhouse knockoff "fake" trailers being made into full length feature films.....

Hobo With a Shotgun trailer... ROFL


<object height="385" width="640">


<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9nbl78cj5vM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xd0d0d0&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" height="385" width="640"></object>

ROFLROFLROFL

The Elder 09-03-2010 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnTheWarpath58 (Post 6975536)
It's been widely reported that Lohan had a body double for Machete.

Sorry to disappoint.

All those angles? In the water? Its possible i suppose but thats alot of doubling.

DaneMcCloud 09-03-2010 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Elder (Post 6975854)
All those angles? In the water? Its possible i suppose but thats alot of doubling.

Unfortunately, that stupid twat would sink to the bottom, considering all the sperm in her stomach and coke up her nose.

Sweet Daddy Hate 09-03-2010 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 6975857)
Unfortunately, that stupid twat would sink to the bottom, considering all the sperm in her stomach and coke up her nose.

LMAO That's no way to talk about your neighbor, Dane.

Deberg_1990 09-03-2010 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud (Post 6975857)
Unfortunately, that stupid twat would sink to the bottom, considering all the sperm in her stomach and coke up her nose.

Id still hit it! : )

DBOSHO 09-03-2010 10:22 PM

I had a sneaking suspicion that wasn't really lohan. In the scene where she shows her tits, her face is turned and hair is covering it. Oh well.


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