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-   -   Funny Stuff Priceless ? (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=282417)

ROYC75 03-19-2014 08:49 PM

Priceless ?
 
Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party.

As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!!

Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: 'Honey,breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian.

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, 'Son, what happened last night?

Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind you fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door. Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean "? I have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?

His son replies, 'Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, Leave me alone bitch, I'm married!

Broken Coffee Table: $239.99
Hot Breakfast: $4.20
Two Aspirins: $.38

Saying the right thing at the right time......

PRICELESS

Jewish Rabbi 03-19-2014 08:59 PM

Kill yourself

In58men 03-19-2014 09:14 PM

with a butter knife.......

Rain Man 03-19-2014 09:36 PM

Wow, this doesn't sound like something Jack would do at all. I wonder what happened.

Titty Meat 03-19-2014 09:38 PM

Too long didn't read

Jimmya 03-19-2014 10:24 PM

Nice story.

ForeverChiefs58 03-20-2014 03:51 AM

I heard Jack was interested in the chiefs

Pushead2 03-20-2014 03:56 AM

http://www.globalnerdy.com/wordpress...-story-bro.jpg

InChiefsHeaven 03-20-2014 05:32 AM

I thought it was funny.

BlackHelicopters 03-20-2014 07:30 AM

Bring him in for a look?

Sully 03-20-2014 07:35 AM

shitfrommyinbox1995@aol.com

Lzen 03-20-2014 08:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by InChiefsHell (Post 10503538)
I thought it was funny.

5 years ago?

Dave Lane 03-20-2014 08:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lzen (Post 10503686)
15 years ago?

FYP

Phobia 03-20-2014 09:05 AM

I remember when Jesus Christ used to tell this to all his followers. It always got the crowd into the game.

Chief Pote 03-20-2014 09:47 AM

Is this real life?


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