Late night bullshit: summarize a novel of your choice in one sentence.
 

The Great Gatsby: Everybody sucks because we are simultaneously driven by craven, primordial desires while trying to mask that that's all we're doing, which is all easier to do when you're rich.

The Dig: Astronauts investigating a rogue asteroid in Earth orbit get warped to a mysterious planet, which they investigate, leading to strange discoveries of ancient technology, lost alien races and dire consequences.

Jaws: A huge shark ****s shit up and eventually dies after eating a lot of people.

The Sun Also Rises:

People will always desire what they cannot have.

A Song of Ice and Fire (aka, HBO's A Game of Thrones): Tits with a chance of dragons.

The Andromeda strain. We're all ****ed until the game changes.

Any David Sedaris memoir: Heterosexual Americans are so stupid and I am so goddamn clever.

Old Man and the Sea: Damn Fish!

The Fountianhead:
http://ih2.redbubble.net/work.57688....e-me-me-v3.jpg

The Heart of Darkness: People are bad mmmmkay?

50 Shades of Grey: Women get ****ed

Catch 22: ****; we're ****ed.

Life of Pi: Holy shit, a tiger.

WOOL: After a nuclear & biological disaster, mankind finds itself struggling to survive underground and come to terms with what they've done.

http://www.amazon.com/Wool-Omnibus-E...dp_kinw_strp_1

Jobs: Steve was a modern day Da Vinci & ****ing insane.