Being Buried Alive Sucks
 

I had two recurring nightmares as a child. One involved being chased down endless, dark caverns by a guy wearing a suit of armor complete with helm and wielding a mace. In the other one, I was buried alive in a coffin.

My mother told me that it wasn't a good idea to read Edgar Allen Poe at my age, but I didn't listen.

Anyhow, last night I had that buried alive dream again. I'm pretty sure that it's because of my upcoming encounter with the oral surgeon, but damn I hate that dream. In the vision, I am confined in complete darkness and suffocating. I try to yell and holler and call for some helpful moles to dig me out, but the moles do not hear me. That's when I begin clawing at the coffin lid unsuccessfully. About the time that full panic ensues, I awaken and it takes me a moment or two to realize that I am okay.

They say that, if you don't eat before retiring, it will reduce your tendency to dream about being buried alive. So, today I'm fasting all day and thinking really, really positive thoughts about not being buried alive.

FAX

Be thankfull you never had the nightmare about knife wielding clown midgets.

How can you post while being in the ground?

And your doctor works on Sundays?

I used to have 2 recurring dreams that I hated. In one I would be chased by a bear that had human like features and was really smart. I would try to hide from him and he would always find me. In the other one a witch would turn me into an apple. It was so real I could taste the apple.

Even after I would wake up I would still have the apple flavor in my mouth and both dreams would bother me all day. I could never get them out of my head.

They had a cure for this in the Kill Bill series. The 6" punch.

No. That appointment is on the 28th. I'm kinda nervous about it, though.

Sometimes, when I have a dream, I know inside the dream that I'm actually dreaming while I'm inside the dream. This buried alive dream, though, is different. It's like I'm really there. It's the worst dream of all times.

I've pulled my bow and arrows out of the basement closet and if I see a guy with a shovel today, he's a dead man.

FAX

That first one sounds like a classic Sasquatch dream. Those are bad news.

But, I can totally relate to the thing about tasting the apple. When I awaken from the buried alive dream, it's like I'm still there ... for a few moments,anyhow ... in the dark with the smell of the dirt and all. It's very real to me.

I wonder if I am the reincarnation of a dude who was buried alive. And you, Mr. Cornstock, in a past life, could have been an apple.

FAX

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It probably won't happen to you, though.

My first question are you the first one of day?

If he hasn't already FAX, Saul (the bad one) will probably neg rep you for talking about your dreams. For some reason he hates that. I figure it has something to do with a dream he once had about being fondled by a jackalope while Jerry Sandusky sat in the corner beating off and Joe Paterno pointed and laughed. That could scar a guy I imagine.

Luckily you didn't use the word dream in your title so he may not notice and you may be safe from his wrath.

You'll love the last 30 seconds Mr Fax

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ROFL

I was unaware of Mr. SaulBadGuy's vigilante efforts to rid us of dream discussion.

But, to be honest, unless he plans to bury me alive, I am unconcerned.

FAX

You're probably going to be ok then. I doubt his rep stick will put you in the red which... lets face it... is very possibly a fate worse than actual death.