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-   -   Birthday Gift Suggestions for the Wife (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=273902)

NewChief 06-18-2013 12:41 PM

Gift Suggestions for the Wife
 
Okay, I know I'm just asking for it... but... I need help getting my wife something for her birthday (coming up this weekend).

Here's the problem: I'd normally just go buy her clothes or jewelry. Unfortunately, since she opened her own business, she trades with other stores who have clothes/jewelry. As such, she gets herself whatever she wants already in those types of items.

Dick in a box is not an option.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:42 PM

Get her a pair of slippers & a dildo

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:43 PM

Wait - she already got one?

Demonpenz 06-18-2013 12:43 PM

Jim johnson

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:44 PM

Alex Smith Jersey

Rain Man 06-18-2013 12:45 PM

Dick in a - oh. Never mind. Just read the opening post.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:46 PM

Sleep member bed

Rain Man 06-18-2013 12:46 PM

Spa day with an attractive female masseuse. Other than the fact that you're not there, it's kind of a threesome.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 9759454)
Spa day with an attractive female masseuse. Other than the fact that you're not there, it's kind of a threesome.

No need to be sending her to the other team

J Diddy 06-18-2013 12:47 PM

Never get a woman a dildo. That screams "get in the kitchen and work bitch."

Always a vibrator. That says I love you enough to buy electronics to do things to you so I don't have to and you don't have to work at it.

The Pest 06-18-2013 12:49 PM

Kanye's new CD. I heard it's the best ever.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J Diddy (Post 9759461)
Never get a woman a dildo. That screams "get in the kitchen and work bitch."

Always a vibrator. That says I love you enough to buy electronics to do things to you so I don't have to and you don't have to work at it.

Ya but the dental bill is atrocious

BoneKrusher 06-18-2013 12:49 PM

i was gonna suggest a Matt Cassel jersey but i just saw clothes aren't an option.

Dragonocho 06-18-2013 12:50 PM

Hotel on the plaza for the night for her and her friends, assuming you have kids and she needs a night off

Donger 06-18-2013 12:51 PM

Send her to one of those day spa/salon places.

blaise 06-18-2013 12:52 PM

Get her car detailed.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dragonocho (Post 9759473)
Hotel on the plaza for the night for her and her friends, assuming you have kids and she needs a night off

Once again, don't send her to the other team.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 12:54 PM

Since she owns her own business, how about an insurance plan for it

NewChief 06-18-2013 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blaise (Post 9759478)
Get her car detailed.

I thought about this, but it's a sore subject because she wants a new car.


I also thought about getting her a Hot Wheels car, though, but she won't think it's funny.

NewChief 06-18-2013 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dragonocho (Post 9759473)
Hotel on the plaza for the night for her and her friends, assuming you have kids and she needs a night off

Yeah. I've thought about doing a staycation with her as well. Just renting a room downtown and getting someone to watch our kids for the night.

J Diddy 06-18-2013 12:56 PM

Step 1. Grab a piece of paper
Step 2. Write "Gift certificate for one night of washing dishes"
Step 3. Hand it to her.
Step 4. BJ and steak

NewChief 06-18-2013 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J Diddy (Post 9759490)
Step 1. Grab a piece of paper
Step 2. Write "Gift certificate for one night of washing dishes"
Step 3. Hand it to her.
Step 4. BJ and steak

Yeah. I might have to check my man card, but I do everything in the kitchen from cooking, to cleaning up, to buying the groceries.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759499)
Yeah. I might have to check my man card, but I do everything in the kitchen from cooking, to cleaning up, to buying the groceries.

Jesus Christ. Just get a live in maid then.

J Diddy 06-18-2013 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759499)
Yeah. I might have to check my man card, but I do everything in the kitchen from cooking, to cleaning up, to buying the groceries.

Maybe you should give her a bj and a steak then.

:p

Bugeater 06-18-2013 01:03 PM

How about a nice table saw?

NewChief 06-18-2013 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ptlyon (Post 9759502)
Jesus Christ. Just get a live in maid then.

I mean, she does work 20 hours of freelance art direction work a week in addition to owning her own store and design business.. so yeah... I have to pick up quite a bit of the slack.

DMAC 06-18-2013 01:04 PM

Take her to Eureka Springs, stay at the Crescent, get wasted and look for ghosts.

BlackHelicopters 06-18-2013 01:05 PM

Lunch with Herm Edwards.

redhed 06-18-2013 01:06 PM

Once DiaB is off the table, the only other option is a LJS gift cert.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759511)
I mean, she does work 20 hours of freelance art direction work a week in addition to owning her own store and design business.. so yeah... I have to pick up quite a bit of the slack.

What is this "freelance" you speak of? :hmmm:

BlackHelicopters 06-18-2013 01:10 PM

Hours and hours of cunnilingus

ptlyon 06-18-2013 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theelusiveeightrop (Post 9759524)
Hours and hours of cunnilingus

No need to catch throat cancer

NewChief 06-18-2013 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ptlyon (Post 9759523)
What is this "freelance" you speak of? :hmmm:

She works as a freelance designer and art director for an invitation company while owning her own invitation/paper store that also does custom work.

patteeu 06-18-2013 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ptlyon (Post 9759502)
Jesus Christ. Just get a live in maid then.

She's already got one.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9759548)
She's already got one.

I meant for him, but guess that would be for his bday, huh?

NewChief 06-18-2013 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9759548)
She's already got one.

4321

patteeu 06-18-2013 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759555)
4321

:p I'm just kidding. I do a lot of our kitchen work too because I also have a busy wife.

NewChief 06-18-2013 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9759562)
:p I'm just kidding. I do a lot of our kitchen work too because I also have a busy wife.

I also like to eat things other than mac and cheese.

blaise 06-18-2013 01:32 PM

I got my wife a subscription from a company called Eco Emi for Christmas. It wouldn't get there by this weekend, but it's a nice gift. Could maybe print the receipt and put it in a card. They send a box of organic/natural samples products every month. There's a few companies that do something similar.

I got the idea from someone here.

patteeu 06-18-2013 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759566)
I also like to eat things other than mac and cheese.

My daughter asked me the other day if I liked to cook. I told her I like to eat.

blaise 06-18-2013 01:34 PM

Really, when you do the cooking you kind of don't want people in the kitchen. They're just an annoyance and in the way, and give you input you don't want.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9759562)
:p I'm just kidding. I do a lot of our kitchen work too because I also have a busy wife.

So am I. I don't mind doing all that stuff. Love to cool, would rather not the cleanup tho. But the gf & I have a system that works pretty well.

NewChief 06-18-2013 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blaise (Post 9759567)
I got my wife a subscription from a company called Eco Emi for Christmas. It wouldn't get there by this weekend, but it's a nice gift. Could maybe print the receipt and put it in a card. They send a box of organic/natural samples products every month. There's a few companies that do something similar.

I got the idea from someone here.

That's pretty cool. I wish I could find something similar to that with some different products (she's very picky about her cosmetic products, so those would probably go to waste on her).

tooge 06-18-2013 01:38 PM

Don't worry about a box for your dick. She's your wife.

Salon/spa is good too.

Unfortunately, no matter what you give her, she is, ahhhh, still a woman. She still won't forget stupid shit you did 6 months ago etc. Soooo, don't fret over what to get her. Send her off to the salon and have a killer dinner when she gets home.

Rain Man 06-18-2013 01:38 PM

Have you considered giving her some market research as a gift? I can print up some gift certificates.

patteeu 06-18-2013 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759585)
That's pretty cool. I wish I could find something similar to that with some different products (she's very picky about her cosmetic products, so those would probably go to waste on her).

When I read blaise's post, I did a google search on "subscription gift ideas" and found a link to a list of 8 different ones. I just quickly skimmed through it but there was one for coffee, one for dog lovers, one for what seemed like crafts to do with the kids, one for cosmetics, and a couple of others. I'm sure there were other useful links, but I didn't look further. I'm sure there are quite a few that deal with things like coffee or wine or cheese and things like that.

Hammock Parties 06-18-2013 01:59 PM

hot steamy makeout session with trent

Sofa King 06-18-2013 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J Diddy (Post 9759507)
Maybe you should give her a bj and a steak then.

:p

LMAO

Old Dog 06-18-2013 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9759566)
I also like to eat things other than mac and cheese.

see post #31....

tooge 06-18-2013 02:10 PM

Play the game "prison sex" with her.

You: You wanna be the cell husband or cell wife?
Her: The cell husband (doesn't want anything jammed up her ass)
You: Ok. Come on over here and suck your wife's dick

BoneKrusher 06-18-2013 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tooge (Post 9759683)
Play the game "prison sex" with her.

You: You wanna be the cell husband or cell wife?
Her: The cell husband (doesn't want anything jammed up her ass)
You: Ok. Come on over here and suck your wife's dick

:thumb:

Frosty 06-18-2013 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls (Post 9759650)
hot steamy makeout session with trent

ewwww...

BlackHelicopters 06-18-2013 02:35 PM

Instructional session with Jon Baldwin

Baby Lee 06-18-2013 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ptlyon (Post 9759452)
Sleep member bed

Scared to ask.

ptlyon 06-18-2013 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby Lee (Post 9759779)
Scared to ask.

Oops :(

Mr. Flopnuts 06-18-2013 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls (Post 9759650)
hot steamy makeout session with trent

You realize that's her brother, not his? You freak.

The Pest 06-18-2013 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls (Post 9759650)
hot steamy makeout session with trent

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7jp1nqt5I1r6e8ni.jpg

Hammock Parties 06-18-2013 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts (Post 9759793)
You realize that's her brother, not his? You freak.

It's Arkansas.

Earthling 06-18-2013 02:57 PM

If you have a photograph of someone special or dear to her you can send that to a company that makes picture puzzles from photographs. I sent a photo of my dad, deceased about ten years now, and had it delivered to mom on mothers day. It came out really nice and she loved it.

BigBeauford 06-18-2013 03:15 PM

Lunch with JJ Dirden.

Setsuna 06-18-2013 03:16 PM

She's supposed to be your best friend. Figure it out yourself and be thankful you have found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

LoneWolf 06-18-2013 03:21 PM

Give her a pearl necklace.

blaise 06-18-2013 03:24 PM

Make an agenda of the things you plan to accomplish this weekend. Women love that.

Pablo 06-18-2013 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Setsuna (Post 9759941)
She's supposed to be your best friend. Figure it out yourself and be thankful you have found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Somebody sounds so, so rone-ry.

Frosty 06-18-2013 03:36 PM

Threads like this make me so glad that my wife and I don't buy each other presents. No pressure.

Hootie 06-18-2013 03:37 PM

authentic autographed Trent Green jersey

Hootie 06-18-2013 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Branden Albert's Huge Balls (Post 9759650)
hot steamy makeout session with trent

damnit clay

Frosty 06-18-2013 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unnecessary drama (Post 9760010)
damnit clay

At least yours isn't creepy


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