Catherine Zeta Jones' Snatch Causes Cancer
 

Well, I guess if you've got to get cancer, this would be a better cause than smoking.....

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2013/...ral-sex-cancer

Michael Douglas: oral sex caused my cancer

Actor reveals to the Guardian that HPV, transmitted through oral sex, was responsible for his throat cancer

The Basic Instinct star Michael Douglas has revealed that his throat cancer was apparently caused by performing oral sex.

In a surprisingly frank interview with the Guardian, the Hollywood actor, now winning plaudits in the Liberace biopic Behind the Candelabra, explained the background to a condition that was thought to be nearly fatal when diagnosed three years ago.

Asked whether he now regretted his years of smoking and drinking, thought to be the cause of the disease, Douglas replied: "No. Because without wanting to get too specific, this particular cancer is caused by HPV [human papillomavirus], which actually comes about from cunnilingus."

Douglas, the husband of Catherine Zeta Jones, continued: "I did worry if the stress caused by my son's incarceration didn't help trigger it. But yeah, it's a sexually transmitted disease that causes cancer. And if you have it, cunnilingus is also the best cure for it."

The actor, now 68, was diagnosed with cancer in August 2010, following many months of oral discomfort. But a series of specialists missed the tumour and instead prescribed antibiotics. Douglas then went to see a friend's doctor in Montreal who looked inside his mouth using a tongue depressor.

"I will always remember the look on his face," Douglas has previously said. "He said: 'We need a biopsy.' There was a walnut-size tumour at the base of my tongue that no other doctor had seen."

Shortly afterwards he was diagnosed with stage four cancer, which is often terminal, and embarked on an intensive eight-week course of chemotherapy and radiation. He refused to use a feeding tube, despite his palate being burnt on account of the treatment, and so lost 20kg (45lb) on a liquids-only diet. "That's a rough ride. That can really take it out of you," he told the Guardian. "Plus the amount of chemo I was getting, it zaps all the good stuff too. It made me very weak."

The treatment worked and Douglas is now more than two years clear of cancer. He has check-ups every six months, he said, "and with this kind of cancer, 95% of the time it doesn't come back".

The cause of Douglas's cancer had long been assumed to be related to his tobacco habit, coupled with enthusiastic boozing. In 1992, he was hospitalised for an addiction which some at the time claimed to be sex. Douglas himself denied this and said he was in rehab for alcohol abuse. He has also spoken of recreational drug use.

HPV, the sexually transmitted virus best known as a cause of cervical and anal cancer and genital warts, is thought to be responsible for an increasing proportion of oral cancers.

Some propose that changes in sexual behaviour – a rise in oral sex in particular – are responsible. Such changes might be cultural, but could also be linked to fears about the safety of penetrative sex in the wake of the discovery of Aids.

Mahesh Kumar, a consultant head and neck surgeon in London, confirms that the last decade has seen a dramatic rise in this form of cancer, particularly among younger sufferers. Recent studies of 1,316 patients with oral cancer found that 57% of them were HPV-16 positive.

"It has been established beyond reasonable doubt that the HPV type 16 is the causative agent in oropharyngeal cancer," said Kumar, who also testified to increased recovery rates among this kind of cancer sufferer. This would help explain why Douglas was given an 80% chance of survival, despite the advanced stage of his illness.

However, Kumar expressed scepticism that Douglas's cancer was caused solely by HPV, and surprise at Douglas's assertion that cunnilingus could also help cure the condition. "Maybe he thinks that more exposure to the virus will boost his immune system. But medically, that just doesn't make sense."

The GP Ann Robinson expressed interest in how confirmation of this association would affect the rollout of the HPV vaccine, which is currently restricted in the UK. "My main priority with diagnosing a patient with oral cancer is to get them referred as early intervention can be so crucial. Asking for a detailed sexual history would be inappropriate at that stage."

Douglas has two children, aged 10 and 12, with his second wife, Catherine Zeta Jones, as well as an older son, Cameron, from a previous marriage. In 2010, Cameron was sentenced to five years in prison for drugs possession and dealing, and a year later had his sentence extended until 2018 after he pleaded guilty to possessing drugs in prison.

Douglas won his first Oscar aged 31 for producing One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, then took a second in 1987 for his performance as the ruthless capitalist Gordon Gekko in Wall Street. He won rave reviews in Cannes recently, for his portrayal of the pianist Liberace.

Later this year he will be seen alongside Morgan Freeman, Robert De Niro and Kevin Kline in the Hangover-style comedy Last Vegas. He currently has four projects in pre-production, including a dramatisation of the 1986 Reykjavik summit, in which he plays the former US president Ronald Reagan.

Come and get it baby!

http://ts4.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.46393...45739&pid=15.1

HPV can be deadly. It's easily transmitted through skin-to-skin contact, vaginal, anal and oral sex. There's a vaccine called Gardisil that's recommended for any girl above the age of eleven that will prevent cancer caused by HPV.

There is no vaccine for men, and 99.9999% of the time, a man's immune system will clear the HPV in four to six weeks. But once a woman is exposed, she'll have it forever.

Has Michael Douglas never heard the saying "TMI"?

If he didn't eat pussy he'd live forever! A lesson for all the boys (and lesbians).

It's actually a great public service announcement. More people need to be made aware of HPV, especially since there's a vaccine.

It seems ALOT of women have this virus cause of how easy it is to get. Hopefully younger people are getting the vaccine now to help prevent it from being more common

Absolutely. Didn't this Vaccine come out within the last few years? How does it effect men anyway? it seems i hear of this mainly cause it causes cervical cancer in women.

How do we know for sure it was Catherine Zeta Jones p*ssy?

The vaccine's been out for a while and in California, it's recommended for every girl on her 11th birthday (the age when *some* girls begin to begin to explore their sexuality).

It can cause cervical and oral cancer in women. In men, it can cause penile, anal and oral cancer, although the penile and anal is basically restricted to the gay community (something like 1,200 cases a year of penile cancer reported in gay men).

There is no vaccine for men but in some cases, doctors have recommended Gadisil to gay men under the age of 26. Also, condoms are not effective because it's transmitted skin-to-skin.

So guys, get your daughters vaccinated!

LOL no kidding

Zeta is in rehab for her bipolar now.

The virus can lay dormant for decades in a woman's body, so it's likely Douglas got it from his wife, as they've been together for 13+ years.

Scary for sure...

I assume that if it wasn't, this little revelation would have come out (so to speak) in a courtroom.

80% of all sexually active people have had HPV at one point or another. Most people don't realize they have HPV because the body normally clears it in a few weeks.

If a man finds genital warts, he has HPV and should visit a doctor for removal immediately, as those warts can be sexually transferred to a female, thus infecting her with HPV.

Bah in Oakland it's recommended as a pre kindergarten vaccination!:doh!:

Too bad. I always fantasized about her snatch.

What? That's crazy. I asked our pediatrician about the vaccination in March and she said it wasn't approved for anyone under eleven years old.

Sorry bad raiders fan joke!:huh:

LMAO

The vaccine is called Gardasil and most insurance plans cover it.

I would have hit it before I heard this news... Now, sorry to say, that I won't be licking Catherine Zeta Jones Honeypot.

before you go and get your daughters vaccinated.....

http://communities.washingtontimes.c...dasil-victims/

Not saying this is the end-all be-all of data.......but there's a lot of controversy surrounding it........just ask Rick Perry.

Sorry - not trying to send this off to DC...

Good info! Fortunately, I have six years before making that decision and hopefully, there will be more data available.

Lindsay Lohan's snatch causes herpes.

Well, if you gotta go, might as well go out in style....

Just looking at Lohan's snatch causes a penis to explode.

LMAO

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Quick Facts
HPV

Human papillomavirus (HPV) infections are among the most commonly sexually transmitted infections, which can infect the genital areas, mouth or throat of women and men, and either have no symptoms or can cause genital warts;

Out of more than 40 types of HPV that are sexually transmitted, about 15 HPV types are associated with cancer of the cervix and other genital cancers affecting women and men;

HPV infection is experienced by the majority of sexually active women and men and is naturally cleared from the body within two years by more than 90 percent of those, who become infected. Antibodies to the HPV type, which caused the infection, remain in the body to help prevent future re-infection with that same HPV type;

Rarely, HPV infection does not clear from the body naturally and the infection becomes chronic. Among high risk factor for chronic HPV infection are smoking, co-infection with herpes, Chlamydia or HIV; long term birth control use and multiple births;

Women chronically infected with HPV for many years, who don’t get pre-cancerous cervical lesions promptly identified and treated, can develop cervical cancer and die. After Pap test screening became a routine part of health care for American women in the 1960’s, cervical cancer cases in the U.S. dropped 74 percent and continued Pap testing is recommended for women who receive HPV vaccines.

In 2008, about 12,000 American women were diagnosed with cervical cancer there were about 4,000 related deaths reported. Less than 3% of the nearly 1.6M diagnosed cancer cases and more than 500,000 cancer deaths that occur in the U.S. annually involve chronic HPV infection-associated cervical or other genital cancers in women and men.

HPV Vaccine

There are two FDA approved HPV vaccines marketed in the U.S. to prevent HPV infection with several different types of HPV: Gardasil vaccine, which contains 2 of 15 HPV types most associated with cervical cancer and 2 HPV types associated with genital warts and is licensed for use by women and men; and Cervarix vaccine, which contains two HPV types most associated with cervical cancer, and is licensed for use only by
women;

Merck’s Gardasil vaccine was studied for less than 3 years in about 12,000 healthy girls and 14000 healthy boys under age 16 before it was licensed in 2006. Gardasil was not studied in children with health problems or in combination with all other vaccines routinely given to American adolescents. Clinical trials did not use a true placebo to study safety but compared Gardasil against the reactive aluminum adjuvant in Gardasil;

After Gardasil was licensed and three doses recommended for 11-12 year old girls and teenagers, there were thousands of reports of sudden collapse with unconsciousness within 24 hours, seizures, muscle pain and weakness, disabling fatigue, Guillain Barre Syndrome (GBS), facial paralysis, brain inflammation, rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, blood clots, optic neuritis, multiple sclerosis, strokes, heart and other serious health problems, including death, following receipt of Gardasil vaccine.

GlaxoSmithKline’s Cervarix vaccine, which has been used in Europe since 2007 and was licensed in the U.S. in 2009, contains a potent AS04 adjuvant containing aluminum and MPL, which has never been used in U.S. vaccines. Cervarix was studied for less than 6 years in fewer than 1200 healthy girls under age15 and was not tested with a true placebo but was compared against Hepatitis A vaccine and other childhood vaccines that can cause serious reactions.

Cervarix adverse event reports have been similar to Gardasil adverse event reports. As of August 2012, there have been a total of 26,304 reports made to the federal Vaccine Adverse Events Reporting System (VAERS) associated with Gardasil or Cervarix vaccines, including 118 deaths.

more here http://www.nvic.org/vaccines-and-diseases/HPV.aspx

This thread only has 30 posts? CP has lost its burst.

Important safety tip:

Wear a condom on your tongue when you eat pussy or ass. And don't put sugar on it.

My oldest son has been vaccinated for hpv. It was a series of three injections over a period of a few months.

That's cuz people are posting facts & shit

I'd still hit it.

That's the way I'd want to go down.

Literally.

Interesting. I read this weekend that some doctors are recommending that males age 9-26 receive the vaccination but that it's not a widespread practice.

Better safety than sorry!

Still worth it.

9 year olds are going down on chicks these days?

Awesome.

Time to talk to my 10 year old boy.

Teach him good, now

Really??? No one has shown this as of yet?? The 53 second mark is where you need to start looking. So I guess her snatch "entrapped" Michael Douglas?

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/cvbnffx0aCA" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

BS, he got that AIDS from Matt Damon.

If I were going to get cancer, that's the way I'd want to do it.

Yep, that's how we see it. Had it done when he was 13. Our Ped recommended it. Going to do it with our other boys as well. Any edge you can give your kids......

Michael Douglas couldn't be more wrong. Clearly this is Gods punishment for Wall Street 2.

Has her snatch issued a statement?

I still do, i wouldnt let HPV keep me outta that beautiful cookie.