What humans drew the best and worst birth environment?
 

On the bottom half of the scale, I think we can all agree that being born in Afghanistan probably isn't a jackpot today. But is that worse than being born in the Democratic Republic of the Congo?

And what about the best? Is it being born in the U.S.? If so, what state? Or would you propose that it's better luck to be born in Switzerland or Sweden or some such place?

And does the modern time offer the best and worst of all time? I would think that being born in Europe during the Black Plague would be a bummer, or being born in one of those empires that Genghis Khan obliterated, or being born in 1925 in Germany. Is that better or worse than being born in neolithic times and having to fight a cave bear when you've got an impacted tooth?

And does history offer better alternatives than the modern day? Being a Roman during the Pax Romana was probably pretty sweet, and I have the impression that Great Plains Indians were living what most of us would call a nice lifestyle of camping and travel.

So give me your thoughts. What's the best and worst situations for humans to be born in?

Let's set the following rules:

1. We're talking external environment only. It would be unfortunate to be a thalidomide baby, but that's a different thing.

2. Let's talk generally about mainstream births. Being born a Jew in Nazi Germany would be unfortunate, or a woman in Syria, but for these purposes let's try to stick with "general population", which is a blend of gender, race, etc. In the bonus round you can offer up a more specific population, though.


I'll start the bidding with this:

Best: Modern Day Switzerland. High standard of living, clean mountain air, little concern about world events, good chocolate, and lots of good jobs in banks hiding billionaires' money.

Worst: Germany in 1352. The plague had been around for about five years so no one really knew what to do about it and everyone probably was losing loved ones left and right. There weren't a lot of individual rights and career options, and dental problems were addressed by a guy on a horse with pliers. You could get burned for witchcraft if you didn't play your cards right, and there may have still been occasional barbarian hordes.

I was born in Texas in the 1980's. That was pretty dope.

Maybe, but better than Arkansas?

Okay, bad example. Better than Vermont?

Texas above all states if it's in recent decades.

TBH, though, I'd like to experience the glory days of America. A midsize mid-western town through the 40's, 50's, and 60's.

It's best to be born in Olathe KS

Love my white privilege!

So perhaps Theodore Cleaver represents the apex of birth situations. What was the name of his town? Was it ever named?

Mayfield.

A little research shows that Theodore Cleaver lived in Mayfield. There are references in some episodes to the Packers and to Madison, which indicates Wisconsin, but in another episode he was trying to buy a surfboard. Would you surf in Lake Michigan?

I'd have to say growing up near the Mongols during their heyday of conquering and pillaging would be a pretty bad hand to be dealt. Even if you survived the war, the rape, the indiscriminate mass execution and other atrocities you usually wound up being round up like cattle and being used as cannon fodder to suck up the initial siege defense of the next victims.



https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CbQXBQtWcAAQu1f.jpg:large

I'd think pretty much any era where you had to brush your teeth with charcoal and a fuzzy stick would be a crappy deal.

Nice graph. The Mongols were bad news to non-Mongols.

Being born in Cambodia during the Khmer Rouge reign might be similar in scale on a proportional basis. If you kept your head down, you might enjoy the agrarian lifestyle, but if you make one slipup or need glasses or something, you were in big trouble.

Oh dang. Hopefully I would have been born a mongol.

Though I don't think I'd do any raping or pillaging. (Can you imagine how hairy and smelly women's cooters were back then?) I might just pillage the local pub or something.

Being a Russian Male during WWII would SUCK.

A majority of them got killed if I remember correctly.

On one hand, if you were born in Pompeii around the year 60, you're living in southern Italy and can drink wine and be artsy and be kinky with anything that moves...... OTOH, Mt. Vesuvius and streets that doubled as the sewage system.