The Joeckeling of SNR
 

It's happening, bitches.

For the 2013 regular season, SNR argues that rookie tackle Luke Joeckel will be responsible for allowing no fewer than 7.0 sacks, so long as he starts at least 14 games.

If he is responsible for 7.0 sacks or more during this timespan, Direckshun will have his username changed to SNR's Bitch, along with a new avatar and tagline, and work in various phrases about how cool SNR is into every one of his posts from the conclusion of Week 17 to Feb. 15th, along with transferring all his casino cash to SNR.

If Joeckel actually plays like a goddamn top rated tackle, however, and is responsible for fewer than 7.0 sacks during that timespan, SNR will have to tailor each one of his posts from Week 17 to Feb. 15th in a manner to be determined later by Direckshun, along with transferring all his casino cash to Direckshun.

(This bet can be reviewed as of April 25th if Luke Joeckel is drafted by any of the other 31 teams in the NFL, and can be modified on that date. It is also invalidated by Joeckel failing to start 14 games.)

I am sleepwalking through this one, folks.

I will take any and all suggestions for the style in which SNR should have to post.

What are we using to determine responsibility? PFF?

Hmm. I would say it depends where he goes. If it's here - Alex Smith is a sack-taking machine. Joeckel definitely got a lot of help from Manziel though.

That's the only service either of us could think of that reliably records that statistic.

PFF is a good use for this with Alex Smith as our QB. He will get responsibility for some sacks.

nice title

How many left tackles topped 7 sacks allowed in 2012?

Is that a stat you have quick access to?

So if Joeckel is responsible for more than 7 sacks in 14 games you are SNR bitch. And if he doesn't allow 7 sacks SNR is your bitch. Got it.


I think Direckshun is going be SNR BITCH.

Oh man this is gonna be good.

Only six.

3 more allowed 7.

Ill take sacks over INTs. Hopefully somehow he can manage to not get sacked so frequently

LMAO

Oh, SNR.

You've allowed your misdirected hostility at Luke ****ing Joeckel, who hasn't done anything other than be a stud prospect, to shoot yourself in the foot.

And I've won yet another bet.

SNR Likes star trek, right? It would be funny to make him quote the Ferengi rules of acquisition in every post.

I will take scoring drives over punts any day.

He isnt a stud prospect. Or KC would not be trying to move down in the draft.

Anybody have a posting style they'd like to see SNR posting in? I am taking suggestions.

Ke$ha lyrics, limericks, Google-translate his posts to Swahili then have the Swahili translated back to English?

LMAO

Iron clad logic, there.

Portuguese.

Jeopardy theme or game show host. If Jeopardy he has to answer in a question.

So, what happens if Joeckel gets injured? Bet is off I assume?

Any difference on if he plays LT or RT?

What if for some unknown reason he ends up playing guard?

You listen to Matt Miller Mr. NFL Draft Scout don't ya?:hmmm:

The only chance he plays RT is if the Chiefs draft him. And no, that was not differentiated in the bet.

Zero chance he plays guard, so I'm not even entertaining that.

If Joeckel fails to start 14 games, the bet is nullified.

ROFL

No, the Chiefs just know they can trade down 3 or 4 spots and still get Joeckel, or a LT prospect essentially as good as him, while acquiring potentially a 2nd round pick.

Gordon Lightfoot lyrics.

lol **** yes!
Posted via Mobile Device

Seems fair to me.

http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/20...96-d5l17ft.gif

Not necessarily.

This team is going to pass a lot.

You want in, Clay?

I'm taking allllll comers.

I would like to see SNR post as if he was a Klingon. He could pull it off.

Yeah **** you pussy.

Luke Joeckel will give up at least 7 sacks.

sig+ av bet only. One year mfer.

I'd kinda like to see him have to work anal leakage into everyone of his posts. As in "My anal leakage would tell me Geno won't succeed in Philly's system"

wait ... so that means Geno isn't a stud prospect or KC would not be passing on him.

Put your money where your mouth is. I will create an independent bet with you right now under those same terms in the OP but with different consequences.

I've watched more Joeckel tape than you have, I'm willing to bet. Put your money where your mouth is.

I just told you.

Sig + av for a year.

IMO, he'll need to be a top 5 OT to justify the selection for next season.

Just saw this, you edited it in.

If I lose the bet in the OP, my avatar is already taken, for a month or two at least.

If you want to make it a one-year signature bet, I'm in. I'd rather do something more creative than that, but a bet's a bet.

Let me know if that's a deal.

I dont think he's a stud prospect. I just want the top QB prospect and he is it.

You edited it in after the fact, but whatever you need to tell yourself.

sig is cool

i ain't getting too fancy

just want you to eat your words ala BossChief

god, keep whining, jan

I am very comfortable with that.

Deal: done.

I would have preferred something more creative, though. This is pretty lazy.

"Jan"?

Is Jan a thing?

**** that Sta-Puff Marshmallow mother****er; name the terms.
Posted via Mobile Device

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youre going to be snr's bitch IMO

Direckshun is going to be the pivot man in an SNR-GOATSE bukkake party.

Check your PM.

LMAO

Admit it, you're Kenneth from "30 Rock."

I don't watch that show.

I think that's called a Lucky Pierre.

Oh?

How confident are you?

Care to make it interesting?

I'm not kidding. I'm taking all comers.

Isn't "Joeckeling" that system where you try to make your dick bigger?

Man if it is, let me just say, it has been a stunning failure.

Interpret that however you wish.

It's when you take a big, runny, jalapeno milk-shit. For five years.
Posted via Mobile Device

Thanks for that mental image.

Looking forward to Direckjan's thread "Really hard not to like Luke Joeckel."

lolz...ur welcome.
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Branden Albert ain't getting traded, dude. No way we try to "win now" with a ****ing rookie at LT.

If the Chiefs draft Joeckel, he's play RT for at least a season. And he will lose.

So will you.

god, please tell me will NOT trade Albert and draft that useless sack of Jokel....sigh.
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You hear that, Direckshun?

Give the people what they want.

Well, actually don't. Because you're going to be my rape toy to begin the 2014 year.

If you do a good job, I may do some Klingon shit just to reward you for being a good lap dog.

I'm not opposed to it. But I have no idea what Klingon is.

I guess we'll all find out in a year.

I'm your huckleberry
<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/doc%20holiday" target="_blank"><img src="http://i298.photobucket.com/albums/mm250/kingdlou/tumblr_lbwarpvejm1qzadigo1_400.png" border="0" alt="doc holiday photo: Doc Holiday tumblr_lbwarpvejm1qzadigo1_400.png"/></a>

Keeping Branden Albert for a season doesn't make any sense to me if I'm thinking the way this front office is thinking.

It's not really on topic, or anything, just a stray thought following from SNR.

If I'm this front office, I'm probably willing to pay Branden Albert Top 10 LT money, like make him the 5th or 6th best paid.

If he's looking to be the 1st or 2nd best paid, and I'm not willing to do that... then having him play on the tag for a year doesn't make sense. His demands aren't going to come down for any conceivable reason, he's going to be a worse cap hit next year. And his trade value will be lower because he'll be another year older, and potentially injured.

You can get a 2nd rounder for him now. Or you can shit compensation next year, or even worse, let him walk and get zero compensation until 2015.

"Rape Toy". That's a good band name.
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Just be sure to make them all something different. I'm slow in the head and use colors and shapes to identify posters.

Something that takes the most honorable shits in the galaxy

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Luke Joeckel to visit the Eagles next week.

NFL_Draft_Insider@NFLDraftBites

#Dolphins *Mock 3. Luke Joeckel 54. Gavin Escobar 77. Kayvon Webster 82. Robert Alford. Trade up w Oakland for top Tackle, Double up on CBs.

Just secured a third bet.

****ing gold, Jerry. Gold.

<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/gold%20jerry%20gold" target="_blank"><img src="http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l194/kevinwilliams2012/Seinfeld/bania.gif" border="0" alt="gold jerry gold photo: Gold, Jerry! Gold! bania.gif"/></a>

If GoChiefs would step up his frontal lobe and beef up his bet with me, this place is going to be veeeeeeeeeeeeeery entertaining the day after Week 17.

Alright you little bitch, here's some beef:

If Luke Joeckel gives up 7 or more sacks, you have to make little shows of obeisance and prayer to every thread I post. Basically just come in the thread and make a post blowing me. I have confidence you can mix it up.

If Joeckel gaves up fewer than seven sacks I'll do the same for your shitty threads.

LMAO

Now we're cooking with gas.

Keep in mind I'm talking about the exact same conditions as in the OP with SNR.

How long do we need to keep this up? I think this is amusing, but could wear thin after a month. We could do Feb. 15th, just like the bet I have with SNR.

Yeah that's fine.

Done mother****ing deal.

This place is going to be a ****ing circus.

This would be one of our consiquence for who ever loses. Each post must have question form like in jeopardy or we can mix it up with game show references. For 2 months after week 17.

Per Jim Corbett

Geno Smith will visit Buffalo Bills next after Wednesday spent with Chip Kelly's Philadelphia Eagles following a very good visit with K.C. Chiefs

I don't believe you could take on all bettors Direckshun. If you lost others would have you avatar, sig and tag already taken unless you change it to another period of time in 2014 for other takers.

I do think these are very good bets for you though.