Holy crap ... She is on Tonight Show right now and is HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.

I didn't even know a stomach could stick straight out so far.

Is she having triplets? :eek:

That's it Mr. Laz. I'm leaving forever.

Cmon Jessica, have the damn kid already.......

Those are some serious Tig 'ol Bitties

:p

She looks like a giant python has swallowed her whole.....

Hmmm...

Oh shit, I almost spit out my coffee. Seriously though. I would do it and not even think twice about it.

Updated photo of Jessica Blimp-son

:doh!:

She is ruined......

At least 10 stitches

who is that guy shes with

is that the bozo that was in the NFL for like a quick minute and was a TE on the 49ers. And then just quit

Yes Eric Johnson

And people say she is stupid, but look at her boots. She is prepared for when her water breaks!

Jessica Simpson update-still pregnant and still growing. I will also post a Jessica BP picture (Before Pregnancy) to remind us how naturally hot she was, just like Kate Upton today...

When she was FAP material....

http://todayentertainment.today.msnb...well-drew?lite

Jessica Simpson gives birth to baby girl Maxwell Drew
By Us Weekly

Jessica Simpson gave birth to a baby girl, Maxwell Drew Johnson, in L.A. Tuesday morning, Us Weekly can confirm. This is her first child with fiance Eric Johnson. According to a source, little Maxwell (she takes her middle name from her maternal grandmother, Tina Simpson, whose maiden name is Drew) weighed in a 9 lbs. 13 ounces.

After just six months of dating, Simpson, 31, and Johnson, 32, got engaged in November 2010. The pair -- who have yet to set a wedding date -- had planned to hold off on making it official until after their baby's arrival. Rushing down the aisle isn't a priority for the star and her former NFL player beau, anyway; during a March appearance on Jimmy Kimmel's show, Simpson told the host that Johnson "feels like my husband already."

The Texas native was previously married to Nick Lachey from 2002 until their separation in 2005. (The duo famously documented their life together for MTV's hit reality show, "Newlyweds.") Following her divorce from Lachey, the "Dukes of Hazzard" actress dated Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo from 2007 to 2009. In 2011, both Lachey and Romo tied the knot with their current flames; Romo's wife, Candace Crawford, gave birth to a baby boy Hawkins on April 9, and Lachey's spouse, Vanessa Lachey, is currently expecting the couple's first child.

Simpson first shared her own happy pregnancy news with the world on Twitter last Halloween. Tweeting a photo of her wrapped in a mummy costume, she wrote, "It's true! I am going to be a mummy!" Since then, the "Fashion Star" mentor and Johnson have been counting down the days 'til their little one's arrival. In December, Simpson opened up to Us Weekly about her excitement for "mummy"-hood.

"Eric and I love each other so much, and knowing that I love this baby inside of me is so amazing -- I love it so much and I haven't even met them yet," Simpson gushed. "I can't imagine how much love we'll have for it once it finally comes!"

As her due date approached, the bubbly, uninhibited singer spoke candidly about the not-so-pretty parts of pregnancy, dishing on her strange cravings (buttered Pop Tarts!) and embarrassing physical traits ("I just started calling myself Swamp Ass," Simpson told Jay Leno of sweating through her maternity Spanx.) Among the most outrageous? During a March interview on "Jimmy Kimmel Live," Simpson made even seasoned comedian Kimmel blush when she admitted, "I feel like I have a bowling ball sitting on my hoohah. Apparently I have a lot of amniotic fluid, so whenever my water breaks, it will be like a fire hydrant!" And speaking to Ryan Seacrest in an appearance on his radio show last month, the fashion designer opened up about her third-trimester sex drive. "I am definitely 'feeling intimate,'" Simpson told the host. "I'm kind of unstoppable right now. The Big O is, like, the biggest O ever!"

Good for her.

Making fun of pregnant women. Really?

Why would anybody name a baby girl Maxwell?:hmmm:

Yeah, I read the name and thought maybe they misprinted girl instead of boy. Maxwell Drew doesn't really sound like a unisex name.

That kid is going to breast feed until it's 12-13 years old.

ROFL

Big baby nearly 10 lbs but just like all celebrities she gives the girl a really dumb name.....MAXWELL DREW

WTF????

He'll run around shouting I want to see the little man fly!!!!!!!

A friend of mine tweeted this earlier today...

Buttered Poptarts in the nuke for like 15 seconds rock...

i'd hit it but I wouldn't tell anyone about it

http://ll-media.tmz.com/2012/06/22/j...exc-8-480w.jpg

http://ll-media.tmz.com/2012/06/22/j...xc-10-480w.jpg

Okay.

Hasn't she been pregnant for a couple years now?

She's just fat.

Time for the trainer.

LOL

Some women just gain a ton of weight during pregnancy.
I'm sure with her personal trainers she will lose it.

I never thought she was great even skinny. Yeah she looked good in Dukes of Hazard. Other than that... pretty common.

Murderer.

She is the 95%.......




......of women that are fat after having a kid.

You must be joking. She was a hard 10 her whole life.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Z-82wxScRk...estyle_010.jpg

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QcsOiuETHc...+hairstyle.jpg

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PhwrbJ-QZ5...hairstyle2.jpg

http://tipsweb.org/wp-content/galler...-simpson-9.jpg

JFC


Thanks Clay.

http://img.ibtimes.com/www/data/imag...ca-simpson.jpg

http://amygrindhouse.com/wp-content/...ew-Johnson.jpg

“Jessica has put on well over 50 lbs,” says Dr. Tara Solomon, owner at The Women’s Wellness Center of South Florida.”She talks about eating cheesecake for breakfast and fried chicken for lunch. She is way too big to be working out, so the weight is piling on.”

Yeah she has some good pics. Just not really my thing I guess. I guess I don't love blondes that much.

reds> brunettes........................................... blondes

FYP

http://fatbackmedia.com/nsfw/wp-cont...d-hair-top.jpg

http://www.aolcdn.com/aolr/jessica-s...400a051007.jpg

LMAO nice work Clay.... better in both of those.

:eek: Damn, Jessica! Put that shit down!!

winner: nick lachey

http://hollywoodfaqs.com/wp-content/...achey-2012.jpg

Don't get me wrong... Jessica is pretty. But even as a red she's not as hot as my last gf (imo) and as a brunette not as hot mf gf before that. Just my opinion. You're all welcome to drool. I like what I like.

I think you should let CP decide, pics or GTFO.

Don't have them anymore. Wouldn't post them if I did have them. Most of you wouldn't agree... I just like what I like.

Yeah here in Cali skinny blondes are the most common female around. I like mine with a big round ass and thick sexy thighs.

I partially lied... I do have a pic of last gf's cleveage that I called "the freckle vortex" and one of her in her undies. Didn't think I still had them. Still not sharing. We may not be together anymore but I'm not about to do the internet to her.

^

Thanks.

I don't hate women as much as you I guess. I don't hate Chrissy at all we just didn't work out. I miss her freckly face though. She's a good girl... I won't open her up to trashing on the internet.

Thanks.

Welcome.

Look up Cintia Dicker. That's Chrissys twin. I'm not saying Chris's body was that perfect but close enough... and in the face.... almost dead ringers. It's scary.

Didn't you say the same about Kate Upton? :spock:

Bizzar. To each his own I guess. I know some on here think some women are too fat (Omaha) that I would rate as perfect.

Yeah I don't find Kate Upton or Jessica Simpson that great. So sue me. Neither are ugly... neither are that hot.

Elbows too sharp for sure.

I heard on the radio the other day she is now coming out with her own line of maternity clothes.

She also just signed a $4 million Weight Watchers deal. Crazy since I am sure her personal trainers will be the ones actually getting her to lose the weight.

She should use some of that money to upgrade her photoshop or pay someone to put her makeup on before being involved in any photos.

She took a picture of herself with this caption:

Just taking a walk around the block... Street legal???
http://lockerz.vo.llnwd.net/v1/photos/medium/x2_d11a53c

:eek::Lin:

wow, look at those huge rolls.

she might lose weight but i'm not sure she'll ever be able to get rid of rolls of skin etc.

tis sad really ... she was so munchable

to cleanse the palate

http://img840.imageshack.us/img840/9...pson15a.th.jpg http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/9...mpson24.th.jpg http://img443.imageshack.us/img443/9...mpson80.th.jpg http://img84.imageshack.us/img84/351...mpson84.th.jpg http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/1...pson469.th.jpg
http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/5...pson120.th.jpg http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/5...pson169.th.jpg http://img812.imageshack.us/img812/1...pson251.th.jpg http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/671...pson439.th.jpg

Wow, she looks absolutely nothing like she did in her skinnier days..

She'll lose the weight. She has too much money and too many people to help her get there, and then everyone will want to give her a jump again.

Tony Romo got out in time. He can look at the pics from the sexier days and say, "I hit that." If she gets back to that form, she would be on my bang bucket list.

:p

You beat me to the punch. I downloaded this photo to do the same thing except I was going to talk about the fact her kid will be eating for a lifetime off those juggs and hopefully she won't drown in a sea of milk.

Those are gargantuan!

For the record, I still would.

I would motorboat the sh*t out of her.

And I'd still hit it. She'll lose the weight soon enough.

Me too

Hard to find jugs that big at a wholesale club. You don't see tits that would dwarf a 10 pound baby very often from someone that used to rock daisy dukes.

Not sure what happened to Jessica Simpson, but I think Kristie Alley is posing as her and may have just mistakenly took her as a giant blonde haired twinkie and ate her.

She is pretty simular to the Nicole Eggert story:

From this:
http://img4.celebscentral.net/images...eggert-105.jpg
http://img4.celebscentral.net/images...eggert-103.jpg
http://www.stud-center.com/wallpaper...gert-19624.jpg
http://www.nicoleeggert.net/wordpres...-eggert-24.jpg


To this:
http://celebritiesgettingfat.com/wp-...now-bikini.jpg
http://thedailyfix.com/wp-content/up...8_122_99lo.jpg
http://celebrityodor.com/galleries/2...t_fail_010.jpg

She may have lost some weight now, but is shell of former self
http://cdn.bourgy.com/wordpress/wp-c...9909885346.jpg

Thats called getting older.

I think gay guys would look at this and say, "Sure, I'll try it once."

http://balancesheet.files.wordpress....soncarwash.jpg

No it's not.

It's called not giving a shit about your diet.

movie guys asked Eggert to put on weight for spoof movie iirc

Fat/ me

LOL

http://cdn.wwtdd.com/wp-content/uplo...at_the_gym.jpg

holy crap :eek:

Good grief. Reminds me of my ex-wife. Scary stuff.

Hulk smash.

:clap:

That's a lot of milk.

Wow. Someone should have told her that you shouldn't eat the baby.

Bet she gets PLENTY of old, half-erect cock now.


. . . oh wait, I thought that was Anna Nicole a few years back.