I am moving to the suburbs. What do I need to know?
 

So my wife and I are urban yuppies and have lived in some sort of urban core / downtown for over 10 years now. We have just purchased a very nice home in Lenexa, KS and are leaving our loft in the River Market for a bigger yard (or just a yard, period), more square footage, and more rare police sirens and gunshots. We are anticipating children in the next few years, which is the main reason for our move.

What do I need to know? How do I make my grass look good? What do I need to do to my wardrobe so that I fit in with all of the other dads? What is the best lawnmower? What's the best brand of pool table? What do I do when I've had too much to drink and can't drive home? What time do I need to stop being loud on my deck and go to bed? Where can I get a legit beard trim and haircut by a real barber? Where is the best place to get a latte? How do I handle my road rage during a long commute?

Thanks in advance, old white dudes.

We need pics of the wife in order to answer most of those questions.

Fertilize, uber, 12 am, chocko sandals

PM Bob Dole.

/thread

The only one of those I can answer is the haircut.

The Gents Place in Leawood. http://thegentsplace.com/

It's expensive, but you get a great haircut and liquor of your choice.

It's an all women staff however, so no barber to be seen.

You won't last a week out there.

I've been going to Buffalo Mane since they opened. Since I still work downtown I'll probably continue to go there, but I do need a good option just in case.

With Kansas drought you want to do this.

<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/fake%20grass" target="_blank"><img src="http://i930.photobucket.com/albums/ad148/virtuallawn/LandscapersCL.jpg" border="0" alt="fake grass photo: Real Artificial Grass By VIRTUAL LAWN Artificial Grass LandscapersCL.jpg"/></a>

Those are all good questions. You ask a lot of good questions.

Home Depot > Lowes.

Oh, and Honda for the mower, and jorts with a tucked in t-shirt would be the proper attire to wear while using it.

dont dress like everyone else

Congrats on your new home! I'm sure you'll enjoy the extra room and may even come to enjoy the yard work. I do have one word of advice on your mower selection: get a loud one. Makes it doubly difficult to hear the wife.

Good luck with your move!

You have chosen..... Poorly