Lighting Farts
 

How old were you when you lit your first fart?

How old were you when you lit your last fart?

Did you ever set the fringe on your cutoffs on fire and whack yourself in the nutbag trying trying to put it out?

Dinny

I've never lit a fart

17. I was stoned.

I hate the off season and no free agency...

Not sure when the last time was. 20, or so.


I learned quickly that you do not light a fart in your underwear.

this

Was this before or after eating Taco Bell?

I saw a kid do that in 8th grade gym class - burned his ass/junk, was rolling around on the floor, the coach grabbed him, turned him upside down and stuck his ass right under a shower head with the water on cold while he screamed bloody murder.

He was a real prick, too. It was hilarious.

And after seeing that, I had no desire to ever try doing it myself.

I remember that the flame was blue. That was kind of interesting.

I've never lit a fart, Mr. Dinny Blues.

I have, however, inadvertently ignited a belch while observing the preparation of some Bananas Foster. It emptied the entire restaurant and, according to the paramedics, char-broiled the waiter's beard.

FAX

19 years old and did it a couple times until I was 20. Had a roommate that did it all the time. I don't believe that anyone ever caught their junk on fire lighting farts. Almost impossible.

I neglected the disclaimer; Anyone who lights a fart w/o protection deserves any subsequent circumstances.

Stout denim or carharts.

If you bite a spearmint certs in the mirror in the dark, it shoots green sparks.

Dinny

What?

Never

Never

No

For some reason I thought it read lightning farts.

"chargers"