An elevator observation.
 

If you're going up in an elevator, and you put your hands in the air and look up with a noble expression, you're pretty much just like Supe rman aside from the floor.

Did the other people in the elavator get it, or are you going back with a cape tomorrow? LMAO

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I think it made them feel secure.


What on earth happened with that revolving door?

Next thing you know, he'll be getting out the tights.

Apricot?

You've lost your burst.

No, it's just a slow elevator.

Awesome, Mr. Rain Man.

This must be another one of those strange, unforeseen, and highly mysterious coincidences on account of the fact I recently learned which is this; when you place a couple of those butane grill ignitors in each hand, fire them up, and invert an eight quart saucepan on your head, people will scramble to get out of your way just like they do with IronMan.

FAX

Anyone ****ed in an elevator?

Who hasn't?

Escalators are the worst, though. It's like doing the big nasty on stairs or something.

FAX

Not as bad as the moving walkway at the airport. I felt so.....naked. It wasn't near the turn-on we thought it would be. And why is everyone in such a hurry these days?

Still, it was better than trampoline sex.

I don't think Supe rman would do that. Too much danger of accidentally severing the cables at the end.

Except, of course, if she loses her footing and you find yourself sliding backwards down the steps with a lock of her hair in one hand and your manhood in the other and you get your belt caught in the stairs and when you get to the bottom you get pulled down to the floor and the steps bang you repeatedly in the face while you frantically attempt to protect your penis from being crushed to pulpish smithereens until somebody pushes the emergency stop button and the paramedics finally arrive to cut you loose with an exacto knife and a pair of pliers and you have to buy new jeans and explain to her father why his daughter wound up on the front page of the local newspaper wearing nothing but half a shredded bra and a potted plant.

FAX

Did you remember to sort of move your arms around like you were dealing with the wind currents? It looks much more convincing when you do that.

If you decide to employ the cape, here's a tip........clothes pins. The cape will clip right to your shirt collar. It's almost invisible.