Quote:
Originally Posted by Cave Johnson
Warning, idealized worldview ahead. People should go into the marriage with the expectation that, if they stop/greatly reduce having sex with their spouses, the mistreated partner is going to go outside of the marriage for sex/affection. It doesn't mean they love their families any less, it's simple needs fulfillment.
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That's kinda my thought.
It's not a comforting one. I mean look at it this way - nothing drives me more batshit than when I spend a week doing 'husband' things; making meals, cleaning the garage, the basement, busting my ass to provide, helping with household shit, etc... and then when she wants to watch some dumb ass Nicholas Sparks move on friday night and I want to watch a hockey game or something, I'm an asshole.
My dad talks about 'the bucket' that you fill. At times you do something stupid and kick the bucket over - shit happens. At times cash in the bucket and knock the damn thing over. And then sometimes it feels like there's just a hole in the bottom of it.
So now apply that to wife stuff. Lets say 20 years into the marriage things have kinda dried up on you. But for the last 20 years you've gotten BJs every tuesday and sex on a reasonable basis. She's cleaned up your shit, cooked your food, raised kids and done a fair amount of shit on her own. And now that she's shutting it down for reasons she deems as fair, you jet out and sleep around on her. To her, she spent 20 years filling that bucket only to find out there was a damn hole in the bottom.
I dunno. This is big boy shit that I'm just glad I don't have to deal with - the answers aren't easy ones (even if that bald-headed, mustachio'd numbnut on television wants to say they are). In the end, I think both sides probably have pretty reasonable explanations for what they do but that shit hurts so people abandon reason and get angry. I can't blame them, I'd do the same thing.