There is something biblical about cutting off the part of your body that offends you (or causes you to sin).
So you have to choose between cutting off your hand, which hoisted all those drinks to your face - or cutting off your winkie, which led you into a bad situation with a skank. If you decide to do both, better do your winkie first, cause that might be hard to do with just one hand.
...and STAY out of the WOOLWORTH's!!!!!!!!!