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Without reading all the replies - don't take the consensus of the board as what you should literally do. I know people have good points to make and are trying to help, but in the end nobody understands the friendships/situation/repercussions involved for any of the parties. If you feel that you really need to talk to the husband and let him know that people know what's going on - then do it. But I would do it discreetly, without threatening him that you'll tell his wife. After all, it's still his life and he has to run it. But IMO you'd be doing him a favour by letting him know it's not a secret.
Am I right in assuming that your fiancee knows what is going on?
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