BatHamas will return from the lazarus pit and confront Pioli on the steps of Arrowhead as Chiefs fans fight Patriots fans in a mass battle.
Pioli and BatHamas will have an epic fistfight, with BatHamas finally punching Pioli's Patriot Way mask off.
At the last second, BatHamas is stabbed in the stomach by Romeo Crennel. As Pioli is about to ban a weakened BatHamas from Arrowhead forever, the door kicks open and Pioli is blown away by a blast from Kent Babb, riding the DrafturbatorPod.
BatHamas, Kent Babb and Clark Hunt confer on how to defuse the Atomic Cassel Bomb threatening Kansas City. The timer is counting down.
BatHamas attaches the Atomic Cassel Bomb to his Drafturbator Wing and carries it out to sea, where it explodes in a blinding flash of light, killing BatHamas but saving Kansas City.
The city mourns and erects a statue of BatHamas. I cry openly at BatHamas' grave.
Later I go on vacation and spot BatHamas lunching with Kent Babb. He smiles and nods. Heroic music plays and we cut to credits.
Alex Smith's current 9.8 YPC is one of the lowest marks in the NFL over the last 10 seasons. Only a few QBs have been worse:
Ryan Mallett (9.8), Derek Carr (9.4), Christian Ponder (9.8), Brady Quinn (9.8), Ryan Fitzpatrick (8.6), Brodie Croyle (9.7), Charlie Frye (9.7), Bruce Gradkowski (9.4), David Carr (9.2)