Put a box around your waist and put a bed sheet on it to look like a tablecloth. Next get a white t shirt and write 1 night stand on the shirt. Find an old lamp shade to wear as a hat. Add additional shit as needed to imply that your a nightstand. The one night stand just advertises that your here strictly on business.
Pro tip. Bring a bat or large stick to fight off the large swarms of vagina
