Wait a minute....this is secretly brilliant.
Originally Posted by Crony coach that is soon to be fired
"Yeah, everyone on this coaching staff is shockingly bad at our jobs around here. Our coach is a hard-headed jackass that hires cronies. Our OC is an under-qualified power-lifting coach. Our DC believes he can coach with the same complexity he would coach a HS team, but there's definite good news. We've gone into the most powerful conference in the country. We're expanding our stadium. We're building up the weight rooms, training complexes, all that neat stuff.
Really - there's one downside to the University of Missouri. Us. How the hell else could a team with this much talent have somehow missed a bowl? It certainly isn't the facilities or the prestige that comes from being in the SEC. Nope - it's raw incompetence from the coaches and we'll all be gone soon. Once Gary, myself and the rest of the hideously overmatched coaches on this squad get broomed and we go full Arkansas, there will be energy and opportunity unmatched in the history of this program.
So come to Mizzou! Where the idiots that are holding you down - namely me and my peers - will all be gone soon enough!"
It's just crazy enough to work...