As a service to our fellow men, perhaps we should come up with a priority list of things to have sex with, so they can make better decisions. I'll start with a few, and others can add to it.
This is in descending order of preference.
Your own hand
Welcome to NFL Sunday! At 11:00 see Peyton Manning flip off the top rope and clothesline Clay Matthews! At 2:00 Drew Brees will hit Terrell Suggs with a chair! Buy your Andrew Luck jersey and let's get reeeeeady to rummmmmble!