[Pasta Little Brioni]

Originally Posted by lewdog

I hooked up with a fat chick once. She looked ok in the dim lighting of the bar and although I knew she was on the "hefty" side I said thought, "Have to try everything once."

HUGE mistake...pun intended.

She was a friend of my buddies gf at the time and when we left the bar, I got her number from his girlfriend. She has made a comment about giving head at some point during the night, although I am not sure of the context. I texted her simply saying, "There is a dick that needs sucking if you want more practice." She responded, "what's the address?....see you in 20."

It was the most incredible, none boner time of my life. She kept trying to bite me and I couldn't get/stay hard to save my life. She tried three times to put it in, while trying to ride me, but it kept getting limp. She was a massive wildebeest. I knew she was bigger but her outfit easily hid an extra 50lbs of weight she had when she was naked. I made the room as dark as I could to try to place myself in a different universe. Finally after trying to screw she decides to give me head. I manage a painful 10 minutes of her blowing and without warning her I finally blow it right into her mouth without even being fully hard! My body knew I needed out and I thank God to this day for helping me through that event. I am still unaware to this day if I am the first person in the world to blow it while not being hard. A physiological response I suppose to a high stress situation in which my body had to "perform" to get me out of the situation.

I start to get dressed and she says, "my turn," with this creepy little smile. I politely suggest that she needs to leave, we are done. She keep insisting so I gather her clothes and shoes and really suggest she needs to leave. She dresses and calls me an arrogant asshole prick.

I have yet to go back to the darkside and hope I never will....

Bahahahahaha