I went with Schumer and Aselton
Schumer just reminds me of the dirty girls I dated in catholic school all growed up.
Aselton is the perfect woman to me: just good looking enough I'd never stray, smart enough I'd be kept on my toes, and any woman that can name the last 3 leading rushers has my attention...
"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).