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DALE EARNHARDT, JR ADDED TO CHASE TWICE
Succumbing to pressure from delusional fans who nonetheless spend metric shit tons of money, NASCAR announced today that Dale Earnhardt, Jr. will be awarded two spots in the Chase for the Sprint Cup. Doppelganger Earnhardt, the 14th but probably not last entry into the circus, will coincidentally but invisibly run side-by-side with Ordinary Earnhardt, and will accumulate equal point totals with all of them being added to Ordinary's total haul.
Brian France coughed, sighed and said before fleeing, "I have the authority to do that. We will do that."
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