[Rasputin]

Am seriously thinking about getting a CDL and become an over the road truck driver. The big rigs. I just can't make a living to what I'm doing so I got to find something give me a boost. This is kind of a big decision to make.

I know I can drive a truck, I was a delivery guy (box truck) for 12 years. I had to give that up do too back issues. That was halls to the balls work and demand, but I was good at it. Was top rt sales driver for my region, I KICKED ASS! Got a trip to Cabo San Lucas for my efforts. Well that was fun but my back was giving out and left me with nerve dammage in my low lumbar. If I didn't give it up and later have back surgery I sure could have been parolized.

That's my fear right now with change is ****ing up my back again. I like what I'm doing now working with handicap but it sure doesn't pay.

I think I can handle hauling grain or such product just hook up to a trailer and go. I got an opportunity to work for a local company I met the owner. I just have to pass the CDL test and I'm hired. Shouldn't be a problem if I studdy for it, but getting behind the wheel of a truck is a bit intimidating as that is a big responsiblity to handle. I need to let my fears step aside and just be a man, I'm two years away from being 40 so I can't say I'm 40 and I'm a man yet.

That's the other thing, I'm not getting any younger and I don't have much to show for what I've done in my life. Other than just trying to get a grip on my bills that I'm way in dept with. I just can't make it today. It's time for change. I wonder what else I can do to bring in the bucks? I'm not smart enough to go back to school, nor do I want too.