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Old 01-03-2013, 11:38 PM   #173
Exoter175 Exoter175 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FAX View Post
Since we're going to die because our brakes suck, perhaps we should consider this;

Given the increase in world population, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find a burial plot that doesn't cost an arm and a leg. (Which, by the way, is actually just about the going rate. If you sell your arm and leg to science, you can just about afford a burial plot.) That's why it's important that we, as a society, devise new and less space-intensive methods of getting rid of ourselves after death.

Personally, I prefer the explosion. Simply place the body in a box along with several hundred pounds of TNT or C4, apply fuse, and stand back. After the smoke clears, nobody will ever know you were here.

There is also the Viking method of floating off in a burning ship. That's pretty interesting on account of the fact that it's kind of romantic and you are eventually eaten by fish who enjoy a good brazed human once in awhile.

I would also put forth the idea of the centrifugal force system. This process involves placing the deceased in a giant tub that spins at extremely high speeds. After a few hours of that, your body will be flatter than a fritter and easily stackable. The value of this system is obvious since about 50 flat peeps take up about the same amount of space as 1 un-flat peep and, when combined with a length of string and some high winds, makes for a halfway decent kite in a pinch.

FAX
Greatest post I've ever read, hands down. I laughed IRL.
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