If Matt Cassel were a girl, he'd be the ****y, fat one who cock blocks you from banging her hot friend at the end of the night
If Matt Cassel were a cell, he'd be cancer
If Matt Cassel were a commissioner, he'd be Roger Goodell
If Matt Cassel were a LT, he'd be Tony Mandarich
If Matt Cassel made the pro bowl, he'd be an alternate
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