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I run two different ones and here's what we do in both (and the third one I'm in has switched to this)
Question 1: Commissioner has full and only say as long as he isn't involved in the trade. If it isn't collusion it's approved. If the commissioner IS involved in a trade there's a three member panel that must approve it.
This is teh only way to do it IMHO, I hate a league vote as there always seems to be an owner that will veto anything just because it doesn't benefit his team.
Question 2: It would be approved in my league as long as I didn't expect collusion. The Matthews owner thinking he was hurt tells me he wasn't paying good attention, but it's not my job to run the other 11 teams. You can't fortell the future. What looks to be a stupid assed trade may not be in the long run (case in point below from one league this season)
Just before week one a team offered J. Charles and R. Wayne for Fred Jackson and Wes Welker. He said he just didn't feel comfortable with Wayne and I told him OK, and damn near the whole league commented that "someone was getting screwed". They were right, someone did.
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