As a kid, I remember making fun of my mom 'cause, if we were out and headed home, the closer she got to the house (and the bathroom) the more she had to pee. I thought that was weird. Now, as an adult, I know the feeling. I only use my bathroom in work, because the commode has enough suction power to take down a chihuahua. As the elevator approaches the top floor, I feel my sphincter tighten. As I get off the elevator and head towards the door, I feel the dreaded "crab-walk quick-step" coming on. By the time the bathroom door's in sight, I'm running for it with cheeks a-squeezin'.
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