[EagleRob]

Twenty years ago I was a floor clerk in a SE PA grocery store. Had a woman all the sudden get an urge to go..bad. I was one of the more reliable do-anything no-task-to-small eight-hours-is-eight-hours kind of guys so I took the call when the service manager made the call for "cleanup". I headed to the ladies room to investigate. From the blast pattern, it appeared the woman backed into the stall, leaned foreword while lifting skirt or dropping trou, and before she could fully settle on the bowl her ass exploded all over the seat, the chrome housing of the pump and flush handle, the rim, the tile wall, the rear ends of BOTH side walls, and the floor. Forensics estimated she was eleven inches off the seat at a projection angle of fourteen degrees up from vertical and four degrees to the left of center. Took me two mops, an industrial grade cleaner bottle, two sponges, a new bucket, and a squeaky clean pair of rubber gloves to clean that head to a sparkling shine in under fifteen minutes. Reward was a full days pay and a pass to leave six hours early to get home on time for an Eagles game Id have otherwise missed.