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I went through something similar about 17 yrs ago. One of my friends that I grew up with couldn't get his shit together and was in trouble a lot, so I started blowing him off and avoiding him as much as possible. He had gotten married young and it wasn't working out, but the difference in this case was he went to the convenience store his wife worked at and dragged her into the parking lot and shot her before he killed himself. I've often wondered if instead of blowing him off I should've tried to be a positive influence to him. Or maybe it wouldn't have made a difference. Who knows.
Nevertheless, I'm sorry for your loss.
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